According to a survey of the National Center for Health Statistics under the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or CDC, there were 1,676,911 marriages in the US in 2020, suggesting a marriage rate of about 5.1 per 1,000 total population. In 45 states that participated, there were 630,505 divorces which shows 2.3 divorces per 1,000 population.

Click here to watch the video on How To Deal With A Vindictive Spouse During Divorce In Michigan 

Do you know the ratio of divorces for folks ages 50 and higher is 10 per 1,000 population? This shows the odds of divorce happening increases as you get older.

Michigan is a “no fault” divorce state. It doesn’t matter what is causing or driving the divorce, the courts will go through the process of granting it. The only thing that matters to the court is the best interest of the child in all the drama accompanying divorce cases.

Why the interest in the reasons for divorces if it doesn’t matter in Michigan courts anyway?

The reason for this interest is to give you context of what drives that one person to make your life difficult during the whole divorce process. When we say difficult, we are referring to the condition giving you the stress of pursuing divorce and pushing the cost of the divorce off your financial ceiling.

The one person in all of that is the vindictive spouse.

The Vindictive Spouse and The Reasons for Being

A really vindictive spouse can manifest their scorn for you in so many ways. You may be familiar with some of them such as:

• Refusing to adhere to court orders
• Lying or hiding assets
• Using the kids as a bargaining chip in the divorce
• Misrepresenting one’s ability to pay support expenses
• Avoiding joint parenting of children
• Causing the divorce to proceed with excessive lag
• Using coercive or intimidating methods during a divorce
• False domestic violence accusations
• Fabricated claims of child abuse
• Adopting irrational attitudes on simple issues

You may have good recognition for these drivers because a big chunk of them you probably contributed, intentionally or unintentionally. Reflect and look back what made your spouse evolve or transform to this individual you now call a vindictive spouse. You have to look back objectively because it can be a large portion of what will be a long talk with your attorney about what is driving this vindictiveness.

If you sum it up, the drivers of divorce (and seem to be true in high profile divorces) can be attributed to infidelity, unbearable financial hardships, physical abuse, and substance abuse.

To some, the outcome of divorce is not just extreme financial adjustments, it affects the general well-being of people.

Statistically, the experience of divorce or separation significantly increases your chances of dying by 23% due to the declining health immediately after a divorce judgment. Health wise a significant 10% to 15% do recover from the pains of divorce or separation. Resilience seems to be the key to surviving the challenges of divorce.

The Unique Opportunities for A Vindictive Spouse in the Divorce Process

We mentioned all those behaviors reflecting the manifestations of a vindictive spouse. Now all that behavior is going to be stalking you after the initial process of divorce.

The waiting period.

The waiting period is supposedly your cooling off period. For a vindictive spouse, cooling off may not be the best word to use considering all the things they are about to do to you and your pursuit of divorce. Your spouse may actually be in a seething scheming streak by being a difficult spouse at home or at work.

In Michigan, the waiting time is at least 60 days for a couple without children and 180 days for a couple with young children.

The rationale for the waiting or cooling off is to allow the couples to sort things out, think things through. The state still believes in preserving marriage. Your spouse may have the same idea about prolonging marriage but it may not have anything to do with preservation. The amount of time can be an opportunity to create “small” and “irritating” inconveniences for you.

While some of these waiting periods may seem excessively long, others can be shortened with the approval of both parties. The whole point is to give you time to think things through. You don’t necessarily have to cohabitate with your ex-spouse just because your divorce isn’t yet official. It simply means you are unable to be remarried at this time, and depending on when your divorce occurs, you might still be required to file your taxes jointly.

The filing of the complaint.

You or your spouse may have been very vocal about it. You may have already had a heads up that it’s coming. A vindictive spouse may want to have a satisfying experience of seeing your face when divorce papers come as a “surprise”. Surprise may be contextual in your case. It may come as a frown, a jaw-dropping, anger, exasperation but it will be satisfying for your vindictive spouse.

The answering of the complaint.

You can’t really be sure if your spouse’s attorney will appreciate it but your vindictive spouse may want to hold on to answering the complaint until the last minute. Your opposing party may want to act on practically any motion just in time just to keep the process lagging.

The temporary orders.

Your spouse may think it’s fun to ignore court orders just to keep you running  around in circles. A vindictive spouse is going to risk being cited for contempt just to spite you. Expect some of those orders to be defied. The lying part will come in handy when the court orders inventory of assets in preparation for property division. In the extreme the kids may even be used as bargaining chips during custody and parenting time.

The discovery phase.

This is where your vindictive spouse’s finest moments of lying and obfuscation will truly shine. You won’t get anything discovered literally because the spouse will be hiding things, uncooperative, and use delaying tactics in submitting relevant documents and information.

The mediation or arbitration process.

The whole point of being vindictive is to deliver aggravation. Make you aggravated. The goal of arbitration and mediation is to find common ground. The only thing common to a vindictive spouse is to put you on the ground. There won’t be a middle ground because the vindictive spouse will not give up or compromise.

In the process of pursuing this vindictiveness, the cost of divorce will go up. Everything will take time. Process will be circumvented forcing your attorney to do a lot of work arounds adding to the cost of serving you. You’re paying your attorney per hour aside from the usual retainers. Nothing will give your vindictive spouse more pleasure than seeing your face aggravated with all that billings.

What To Do, No Magic But This Will Do

There is no magic formula to get around a vindictive spouse. Your spouse is human. That human being is in pain. Maybe it’s because of you. Maybe it’s all their doing or undoing. There’s a whole industry or profession dealing with that pain; it’s called psychiatry and psychotherapy.

One, talk to an attorney.

Divorce is not going to need wizards. It needs attorneys. So the first right thing to do is get a good attorney who subscribes to the vision of what your divorce is going to be. We are always advocating this. Get an attorney in sync with your vision of how you want the divorce to be concluded for you and your spouse. Your attorney might even have a good experience about dealing with a vindictive spouse.

Two, have a heart to heart talk.

We know it will be hard. The word vindictive makes it hard. The talk should not focus on you and your wife but the kids. You need to try especially in a divorce involving minor children. You need to talk about the effect of the divorce process on the children and its ultimate outcome which is being separated from them at certain times. You will need to explain these things and you need to be in sync in making your kids understand. Not for your sake or your spouse but for the best interest of the children.

Three, worry about the financial future.

You need to worry about spousal support, about child support. You have to worry about having to live somewhere, having to find better means of earning because of the added expense of the divorce. You need to have a collaborative attitude to keep the lifestyle to keep the quality of life for your kids.

Four, be very conscious of your behavior.

You need to be deliberate about your behavior. You already have a very vindictive spouse going after you. Don’t behave in a manner adding more fuel to your spouse’s vindictiveness. You also need to have restraint because you might bring your reaction to your spouse with you. Your own kids might get exposed to your behavior reacting to your spouse.

Five, however desperate, don’t use your children.

In your exasperation, you might be tempted to bad mouth your spouse to your kids. Please don’t. It won’t be good for your kids and certainly it won’t help you with the court during the child custody proceedings. Don’t use your kid as a leverage to get to your wife like not allowing contact or restricting parenting time.

Six, take care of your emotional and mental health.

Yes it’s stressful already just considering divorce. It is made even more difficult by a vindictive wife. Find better and creative ways to manage your stress. If you need a therapist, we recommend you go ahead and get one. Find your center. Collect yourself so you can stay focused on what’s important.

Remember, ultimately the divorce process will end. Your ex will stay ex until you die (unless you want to remarry your ex before you die). You will have to work with your spouse to give a semblance of a normal life for your kids.

Your kids will never be the same again after the divorce. School age kids are known to feel anger about divorce. Their grades in school deteriorate. Children start withdrawing socially. Those younger will start regressing with sleeping and eating patterns changing erratically.

You will have to deal with your vindictive spouse not just for the expediency of the divorce process but because of its anticipated impact on your children post divorce.

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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.

If your PPO request was initially denied, should you resubmit it? The best action against abusive behavior is a PPO. A spouse may reapply if the conditions for domestic abuse or violence are met and are supported by documentation, even if a PPO was previously denied. Try again if you’re rejected. PPOs must be granted by courts anywhere, whether in Michigan or any other state, when someone feels they have been mistreated or abused by a family member, domestic partner, or another person. If the PPO is denied, try again.

Click here to watch the video on Can A Spouse Ask for A PPO Again If Denied In Michigan?

An order from a judge to cease threats or violence against you is known as a personal protection order (PPO). If someone is threatening, harming, bothering, or stalking you, a PPO can assist in defending you. If you have a justifiable concern for your personal safety or liberty, you may be eligible for a PPO.

There are three types of PPOs:

• Domestic Relationship PPO
• Nondomestic (Stalking) PPO
• Nondomestic Sexual Assault PPO

Spouse In His Insanely Abusive And Absolutely Lowest Being

Since you will be dealing with a spouse, the type of PPO you need is the Domestic Relationship PPO. 

To secure a domestic relationship PPO, you may need to put in effort to paint a picture in the mind of the judge of the possible harm, assault, stalking or harassment you are facing from your abuser. You must also provide evidence of your domestic relationship with the abuser.

The abuser is your domestic partner if they are:

• Your spouse, either present or former
• The other parent of your child
• Someone you currently live with or previously did
• One of your romantic relationships

A PPO for a domestic partnership may forbid the abuser from:

• Breaking into your home or another location
• Beating, abusing, assaulting, or injuring you or another person
• Threatening to harm or kill you or another person physically
• Removing your kids if you have custody of them legally
• Getting a gun or owning one
• Preventing you from transferring your children or personal belongings from a location that the abuser owns or rents
• Interfering with you at work or school, or acting in a way that damages your relationships with coworkers or your learning environment there
• Having your home/work address or phone number available in records pertaining to a child of yours both
• Following you or stalking you
• Injuring or threatening to harm an animal you own, taking the animal from you, or keeping it from you with the intent to cause you mental pain or control
• Anything else in particular that restricts your personal freedom or causes you to be fearful of violence

Although the judge will determine what your PPO would forbid, you may include specific protections in your petition.

The petition is used to provide the judge with critical information to help them decide whether to grant you the order you seek. Explain what the abuser has done to you and how you have been harmed as best you can. Try to recall the dates of seasons when the events occurred. You are not required to have police reports or other documents to obtain a PPO, but if you do, you should include them with your petition. They can assist the judge in comprehending what has occurred to you.

You Want the PPO Now Not Later

You may be concerned that the abuser will harm you if you do not obtain a PPO right away. You may be concerned the abuser will harm you if they discover you are seeking a PPO. If so, you can request an ex parte order, which is an emergency order. You won’t have to wait for a hearing if you get an ex parte order. The abuser will not know you’re requesting a PPO if you use an ex parte order.

If you do not request an ex parte order in your petition, the court will hold a hearing to determine whether you should be granted a PPO. If the judge denies your petition for an ex parte order, you can request a hearing within 21 days. In either of these cases, a copy of the petition and a notice of hearing must be delivered to the abuser. 

The abuser will be able to attend the hearing and respond to the information contained in your petition. In this case, the abuser will be aware that you are seeking a PPO before you are protected by an order.

What About A “No Contact” Order?

Aside from a PPO, there is another legal order you can use to prevent your spouse from having access to your person especially if your spouse has a run in with law enforcement causing a warranty of arrest is issued.

In a criminal prosecution, a “no-contact” order is typically a bail requirement. Usually, a “no-contact” order disallows your abuser from:

• Making calls to you
• Writing to you
• Making another person contact you.
• Contacting you directly

The judge has the authority to revoke or raise the bail’s amount if the abuser disobeys a “no-contact” order that is a requirement of bond. After a condition is ordered, it can only be altered by the judge.

A PPO is still necessary even if there is a “no-contact” order in a criminal prosecution. The bond with the “no-contact” restriction will be revoked and the abuser will be permitted to get in touch with you once more if the criminal charges are dropped. If a “no-contact” order is revoked, if you have a PPO, it might shield you from the abuser.

At the Circuit Court Level This Is How to Proceed If the PPO is rejected

You may not always get the PPO on some rare occasions, but in the event it does get denied, there are avenues to do it all over again.

Here’s what you do if your PPO is denied.

[1] Ask for a hearing date and time, get in touch with the Circuit Court Clerk’s Office.

[2] Fill out and submit the Clerk’s Office Notice of Hearing on PDF Personal Protection Order Form.

[3] Fill up and submit the PDF Circuit Court Order.

[4] Organize the delivery of the Notice of Hearing, PPO Petition with Questionnaire, and Praecipe to the opposing party by:

• Personal service (can be performed by a process server or another adult). Or,
• Using certified mail & restricted delivery (send the PPO to the “respondent,” who was the target of the PPO).

What is a Praecipe? 

Latin’s praecipe means “to command.” A petition is a written motion or request asking the court to take some action, most often a trial or the entry of judgment. In terms of common law, it is a writ directing a defendant to take a certain action or to provide justification for their inaction. Federal, state, and municipal laws on praecipe differ by region influence policies.

Don’t Take Chances, Always Carry Your PPO Papers In Your Person

Maintain a copy of your PPO and Proof of Service at all times. A backup copy should be stored securely. To distribute extra copies of the order to your children’s schools or daycare facilities, your employer, and other people who should be informed about it, ask the clerk of court.

Given the numerous instances of assault and stalking committed against women, this is a particular worry for them. More than 25% of women in Michigan claim to have been raped at some time in their life (this includes perpetrators who may be known or unknown to them).

Throughout Michigan, nearly 42% of women will experience rape, physical violence, and/or stalking in their lifetimes, according to a report on violence against women and children. Victims don’t always seek out legal police or medical treatment.

Your risks of being harmed by the abuser may increase if you leave an abusive relationship or seek legal counsel. It can be beneficial to prepare in advance for your protection. If you feel endangered, your safety plan may specify where you will go or who you will call. It may contain crucial contact information, an escape route, and a list of essentials to take with you when you leave the abuser.

For assistance considering your safety alternatives and creating a safety plan, get in touch with your neighborhood domestic violence organization, the Michigan Coalition to End Domestic and Sexual Violence, or the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

For as long as the conditions for abuse or possible harm exists, the PPO is a legal way to prevent someone you know, like a spouse, from inflicting harm or posing a threat to your person or your child. 

If you are denied, file it again. Ask help from your attorney.

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Generations of children born outside of marriage are being produced through marriages and relationships today. Who Has Parental Rights When Parents Aren’t Married In Michigan? 

Click here to watch the video on Who Has Parental Rights When Parents Aren’t Married In Michigan?

In Michigan, it is assumed that the mother is the woman who is giving birth in the relationship. To even define his relationship with the child, the father must still claim paternity. Since he must first establish paternity, the father may need to consult a lawyer before discussing parental rights and custody. Your lawyer may discuss the DP code’s child custody procedures while making reference to the case’s paternity difficulties. Your attorney will submit a petition to conduct a paternity test in order to prove fatherhood.

Wife or Husband: Are You A Parent?

In the context of parental rights, who is a parent? Legal parental responsibility and authority are viewed as belonging to both biological and adoptive parents with regard to their children. Parental rights allow parents and other legal guardians the authority to affect how their children are raised.

Parental rights include assuming custody of the child or children on a legal and physical basis; having specific visiting and contact rights; transferring possessions as an inheritance; signing a contract on behalf of their minor child or children; and making decisions about important issues, such as:

• Education;
• Religion; and
• Medical interventions and health care;

Parental rights are intended to safeguard, protect, and ensure the wellbeing of a child or children. The laws governing parental rights vary significantly from state to state. However, a court’s interpretation of parental rights will be based on what is best for the child.

Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other family members, however, typically lack parental rights. However, if they have been granted legal guardianship of the minor child or if they have officially adopted the child, they may have parental rights.

Legal guardians frequently have obligations and rights that are similar to parental rights despite not being parents.

Don’t forget your step dad. In the US, between 10 and 20 percent of children had at  least one stepparent. The legality of stepparent rights in shared custody situations is a challenging discourse for stepparents.

Stepparents can influence young children and assist the biological parent with their tasks. However, they do not automatically acquire any rights or obligations as a result of a marriage. For the children of the biological parent, stepparents are virtually “legal strangers.”

A parent or guardian of a minor child may name a different individual as the temporary beneficiary of a power of attorney transferring parental responsibility, as provided for under a Michigan law. 

Just as there are parental rights, there are parental responsibilities. Child custody is one form of parental responsibility. Parental responsibilities can come in the form of ensuring a secure atmosphere for living, defending the kids from threats like abuse, providing the required child support, supplying the fundamental requirements of the kids like food, water, and shelter, discipline, investing in their education, understanding their interests, and simply being there for their needs

Paternity: I Am Your Father!

Since 2008, the percentage of births to unmarried mothers in the United States has risen from 4% of all births to more than 40% annually. This growth has been accompanied by an increase in the proportion of biological fathers who are not married to their children’s mothers.

Birth fathers have attempted to establish their rights to their children as society has become more accepting of nonmarital children, including whether to parent them, maintain a relationship with them, and exercise consent in the adoption process.

If the parents are not married, the child’s mother must sign and file a document called an “Acknowledgement of Parentage” before a man can be legally acknowledged as the child’s father. This document, which is legally enforceable, notifies everyone that the mother and father agree that the guy is the child’s biological father.

According to Michigan law, if the mother and father of a child born out of wedlock are unable to reach an understanding regarding the child’s parentage, the father has the option of filing two different documents to defend his parental rights. 

The “Notice of Intent to Claim Paternity” is what he would submit first. In the event where the father is concerned about the minor child being put up for adoption. It may be especially crucial to submit this before the child is born.

In addition, a father has the option of delaying filing a paternity lawsuit with the Circuit Court until after the baby has been delivered. If a DNA test is required, a court order can be obtained after the paternity case has been filed requiring the mother, father, and the minor child to appear for testing.

Can Parental Rights Be Terminated?

Courts tend to lean towards having both parents in the life of the child for the obvious need to ensure financial and emotional support, but parents can lose parental rights. 

You can voluntarily give up your parental rights if someone else wants to adopt the child or if a petition to do so has already been filed (typically by a different family member or by a governmental agency like Child Protective Services). If you want to have your rights terminated in these situations, you might need to appear at a court hearing.

Another option for ending parental rights is by the parent’s own volition. The court will almost certainly view giving up your parental rights as a bad idea if you’re trying to avoid dealing with a child’s behavioral issues or trying to avoid paying child support.

The court may decide to terminate parental rights if the child’s welfare is in danger. The steps the court must take before deciding to terminate will vary depending on the state you reside in. However, ensuring a secure family environment and the child’s best interests will always be the deciding criteria.

Be aware that when parental rights are terminated, you no longer have parental responsibility for the child and your legal rights are removed. A parent-child relationship no longer exists.

Child support is no longer required, but there are also no longer any visiting rights, and the child can be adopted without the consent of either parent. The decision to revoke parental rights is treated seriously by the courts due to the value placed on the parent-child bond.

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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.

Children of married couples are typically the focus of custody disputes. What about the minor children of unmarried parents? Who has legal custody of a child when the parents aren’t married? In Michigan, custody refers to both a child’s place of living and the parent’s decision-making authority. 

Click here to watch the video on Who Has Legal Custody Of A Child When The Parents Aren’t Married In Michigan?

If a parent has legal custody, they are responsible for making choices about the child’s upbringing, including their health care and educational opportunities. A child has a place to live with each parent, and each parent has bodily custody when the child is there, unless the court decides otherwise. Parents typically share custody when married parents are involved.

The Truth About Being a Parent in Michigan

If we are to dig deeper into child custody and the parent’s, shouldn’t we be asking first who is considered a parent in the context of child custody in Michigan?

Both biological and adoptive parents are seen as having legal parental responsibility and authority over their children. 

However, in most cases, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other family members do not have parental rights. They might have parental rights, though, if they have been given legal guardianship of the minor child or if they have legally adopted the child. Despite not being parents, legal guardians frequently have obligations and rights that are similar to parental rights.

The significance of being defined as a parent lies in the capacity to invoke parental rights. Parents have a fundamental legal right to the upbringing and company of their children. The term “parental rights” often refers to a parent’s ability to make choices for their child’s upbringing, including significant issues like education and healthcare. 

In the US, remarriage or recoupling occurs in more than 50% of families. Therefore, 10 to 20 percent of kids in the US have at least one stepparent. For many stepparents, the validity of stepparent rights in shared custody arrangements is a difficult issue. It will be simpler for you to manage your connection with the child and the child’s biological parents if you are aware of your custodial rights as a stepparent.

Parental rights may also involve issues like visitation and custody when parents are living apart, such as in separation or divorce proceedings. Making judgments and acting in the child’s best interests are a part of parental rights.

Do step-parents have parental rights? Can they get custody of their step-child? The answer largely relies on your state of residence and the specifics of your family’s condition. If a stepparent legally adopted the child, they are probably entitled to parental rights.

Your state’s laws governing stepparents’ rights will determine how things work. In spite of the fact that they are not the child’s legal parents, some states may have laws that offer stepparents some privileges such as visitation. If you find yourself in this predicament, you might wish to see a local attorney who is knowledgeable with the laws governing step-parents’ parental rights in your state.

When a person marries a kid’s biological parent, they do not instantly acquire or share that parent’s parental rights in the child. Although divorce might end a marriage, it does not revoke the parents’ legal capacity to raise a child. The parents continue to share joint physical and legal custody. 

Stepparents may influence minor children and help the biological parent with their responsibilities, but they do not automatically acquire any rights or obligations as a result of a marriage. Stepparents are essentially “legal strangers” to the children of the biological parent.

According to Michigan law, a parent or guardian of a minor child may designate another person as the temporary beneficiary of a power of attorney that transfers parental responsibility.

The Truth About Child Custody in Michigan

Different custody plans can be imposed by judges. As long as judges agree that the agreement is in the child’s best interests, parents can agree on a custody arrangement, and judges will typically sign the court order authorizing the arrangement. The descriptions of several custody plans are provided below.

Sole Custody: The term “sole custody” is not defined by law. According to the Michigan Custody Guideline, one parent has sole custody when they are granted both primary physical custody and main legal custody.

A parent has physical custody when they take care of their child most of the time. Legal custody is when one parent is in charge of making all significant choices for the child’s upbringing (such as medical treatment, school enrollment, religious instruction, and participation in extracurricular activities).

Sole custody is typically granted to one parent if the judge feels the parents cannot cooperate for the sake of the kid. The court may decide to grant parenting time to the other parent. When parenting time is granted, the non-custodial parent is in charge of making daily and urgent decisions for the child.

Joint Custody: The court must think about granting joint custody when one parent asks for it. A court must provide joint custody if the parents agree to it unless it finds that joint custody is not in the child’s best interests. Judges must give explanations for their decisions, whether they approve or reject the request, in the official record.

Without a parent’s request, judges may take joint custody into consideration. When deciding on joint custody, judges must also take into account whether the parents will be able to work together and generally agree on significant issues affecting the welfare of the kid. The definition of “joint custody” in the law allows for either joint legal custody, joint physical custody, or a combination of both.

There are two varieties of joint custody:

Joint Legal Custody: Parents who share joint legal custody are able to make decisions that have a significant impact on the wellbeing of the kid. The quantity of time spent with each parent by the child does not affect joint custody.

Joint Physical Custody: Means that the child will spend set amounts of time with each parent; however, it does not imply they will necessarily share parental decision-making responsibility unless the court has also granted joint legal custody. For instance, in a joint physical custody arrangement, one parent may have custody during the school year, alternate weekends, and alternate holidays, while the other would have custody during the summer, alternate weekends, and alternate holidays.

The court order will often specify when the child will live with each parent if the judge grants shared physical custody. To ensure the kid has contact with both parents, the court order may stipulate physical custody be divided between the parents. When a child lives with one parent, that parent makes all regular and urgent decisions involving the child.

Married, Unmarried Does It Matter In Child Custody

So who has legal custody of a child when the parents aren’t married? In Michigan, unless the biological father proves paternity and obtains a court order of custody rights, unmarried mothers are believed to have primary custody of their children. By signing an Affidavit of Parentage, either at the hospital where the child is born or subsequently, unmarried fathers can voluntarily establish paternity with the mother’s consent. 

If paternity is disputed, a father can legally prove parentage, which usually entails genetic testing to demonstrate the existence of a biological connection.

A father will need to pursue a new parenting agreement through extra legal action after proving paternity. But keep in mind that if the mother of the kid is married to another man, that man will already be assumed to be the child’s legal father, making it exceedingly difficult for a biological father to prove paternity and obtain custody rights.

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You cannot give a fixed price for the costs and legal fees associated with your family law case in Michigan. Even if your attorney wanted to estimate a fee, they couldn’t. Divorce cases involve too many variables to be able to forecast how they will turn out, and you are typically reacting to the other party’s actions. It gets even less foreseeable as a result.

Click here to watch the video on What You Can Expect In Legal Fees & Cost For Your Family Law Case In Michigan?

Time is always a factor, along with court procedures and internal law firm procedures. Your own client dynamics haven’t even been taken into account yet. What you may reasonably anticipate is a minimum expense that includes retainers and the cost of appearances. Consider any retainer or appearance costs your lawyer may have provided as a starting point.

Somethings You Need To Know About Before Taking The First Steps in the Divorce Process

Even before getting down to the initial process of divorce, there’s just some things you need to remember because you need to be aware if you should even be doing your divorce in Michigan.

Here’s some things to keep in mind when filing for divorce in Michigan:

[ a ]  Michigan is a no-fault state. No-fault divorce means you can obtain a divorce without demonstrating adultery, abandonment, cruelty, or any other wrongdoing. You can get a divorce even if your spouse doesn’t consent. Even if your actions caused your marriage to fail, you are still eligible for a divorce.

[ b ]  Before filing, you or your spouse had to have resided in Michigan for at least the previous 180 days. Circuit court in the county where you or your spouse have resided for at least 10 days prior to filing is where you must file for divorce. Although it is customary, you are not required to file in your county of residence. Wherever your spouse resides, you may file.

[ c ]  If you meet the aforementioned residency criteria and were married in another state or nation, you are still eligible to file for divorce in Michigan. In Michigan, a divorce can be granted to either spouse without regard to citizenship. However, if your marriage is a condition of your ability to live in the US, a divorce may damage that right.

[ d ]  If you have a legally recognized common law marriage, a Michigan court may award you a divorce. A common law marriage is an arrangement between two people to live as husband and wife even though they are not legally wed. Today, just a few states still accept common law marriage. Since 1957, Michigan has prohibited common law marriage. Now Michigan only recognizes common law marriage if such a marriage was entered in a jurisdiction or state accepting common law marriage.

It Does Matter If It’s Contested or Uncontested And If You Have Minor Children

Your divorce can split into distinct categories depending on whether you are both in agreement amicably about your divorce or if there is animosity between. It will also matter if you have minor children.

The Contested Divorce

The terms of the divorced are disputed by the parties in a contested divorce. The couples can dispute on how to divide the property or whether one spouse has to be paid spousal maintenance. Custody, visitation, and child support arrangements between parents are sometimes disputed.

It may take months or years to resolve a contentious divorce. Discovery and trial planning are conducted by both sides. The court schedules a trial if the parties are unable to resolve their disagreements through mediation or settlement talks. Both sides offer their proof and witnesses at the trial to back up their claims. The judge then renders a decision in accordance with the evidence offered in court and the relevant family court laws.

The Uncontested Divorce

In Michigan, a divorce is considered uncontested if both parties agree to all of the divorce’s terms and circumstances. Property, children, or spousal support are not the subject of their disagreement. The divorce process becomes contentious if there are any terms of the divorce the parties cannot agree upon. The couple saves time and money with an uncontested divorce.

One spouse serves the other spouse with a divorce petition before filing it with the court in an uncontested divorce. The spouse who receives the divorce papers has the option to reply, declaring they are in agreement with all of the terms set forth therein and jointly asking the court to grant the divorce in accordance with those terms.

Divorce With Minor Children and No Minor Children

When your divorce documents are actually filed, it will be designated as a DM designated divorce or a DO designated divorce.

DM is Designated Divorce, Minor Children. All applications for divorce, for separate maintenance, or for annulment involving minor children. Additionally utilized when there are young children involved in intrastate custody, maintenance, divorce, custody, and post-judgment transfers.

DO is Divorce, No Children. In the absence of minor children, any and all demands for divorce, separate maintenance, or annulment. It is also used for intrastate transfers of post-judgment divorce complaints when there are no young children involved.

We just need to mention this here because having a contested divorce means a lot more to do with your divorce matters like property division and alimony. A divorce with minor children will mean you have to talk about custody and parenting time which will define a set of new cases aside from just divorce.

Each case entails a distinct set of attorney fees and per hour servicing costs not to mention court filing fees, mediation fee, petition fee, process server fees, and the more motions and petitions…I think you already get the idea how the calculations will work on your case.

Remember each of these sets of action means more servicing time from your  attorney.

Not only are there many forms for each of these filings, there’s a lot of processes to get these forms and documents filed, signed, stamp, and routed. Copies of these documents are usually provided to the other party which means added cost for copies. You will get a rundown of these filings as your attorney’s billing gets into your mail.

The Steps In Your Divorce Process, It Does Add Up Somehow

Before starting the process of divorce, you need to think through if you should or should not file for divorce.  Like what we mentioned earlier you must have lived in Michigan for at least 180 days and in the county where the case is filed for at least 10 days in order to petition for divorce in Michigan. The earliest date a divorce can be finalized has a waiting time as well. A couple without children must wait a minimum of 60 days, and a couple with small children must wait 180 days.

Once you have made the decision for the divorce, you can now start the process. Of course, you have to start with a divorce complaint.

The Filing of the Divorce Complaint

A complaint, which is a formal legal document, is the first step in a divorce. The divorce complaint is filed in the Family Division of the Circuit Court in the county where the parties reside and assigned to a family court judge at random. The individual who files is referred to as the “Plaintiff” and the other spouse is the “Defendant.”

Don’t worry about the terms “Plaintiff” and “Defendant”. It’s not good or bad those are just names the court assigns to someone filing and someone receiving the complaint. It does not signify any advantage or disadvantage in the filing process.

The defendant has 21 days (or 28 days if served by mail or outside of the state) from the time the complaint and summons are filed and served on him or her to file an answer admitting or denying each allegation in the complaint. 

There are a few different ways to serve divorce papers, but most often a process server delivers the documents to the other party personally. This is usually done with contentious divorce cases. The complainant has the right to petition the court to make specific orders, sometimes known as ex-parte orders, if necessary.

Ex-parte orders can deal with things like child support, parenting time, child custody, protection from abuse or harassment, and an order that forbids the other party from hiding, stealing, or destroying property after receiving divorce papers. At the same time the party receives the complaint, they are simultaneously served with these directives.

The Defendant’s Filing of the Answers to the Divorce Complaint

The defendant responds to the charges in the complaint, stating whether they are true or not. Any contested issues then typically start to surface in the answers. Additionally, a counter-suit for divorce will typically be filed by the person who responds to the complaint.

The case is in dispute after the answer is submitted. 

The Defendant’s Failure To Answer the Divorce Complaint

A default order may be entered if the defendant fails to submit an answer. After that, the case becomes an uncontested divorce. However, before the case is over, a defendant who has defaulted may choose to hire a lawyer and ask the court to overturn the default.

Uncontested or contested divorces must first go through a final court hearing to decide if the allegations mentioned in the complaint are true. The party who shows up for the last court hearing is often the plaintiff. The last hearing is not mandatory for the defendant to attend.

The Case Begins In Discovery

As soon as the case gets underway, the attorneys determine which issues are likely to be contested and gather the pertinent information through research and discovery. The several types of discovery include depositions (questioning a witness under oath), third-party subpoenas, interrogatories (asking a party questions that they must respond to under oath), requests to produce documents to the other party, and requests to admit (asking the other party to agree that certain facts are true).

The discovery process is not required if the parties are aware of the values of the assets and liabilities. Discovery is required if the values and amounts are unknown to either one or both parties. The goal of discovery is for the lawyers to ascertain all of the parties’ assets and debts. In the event that one party makes an effort to conceal or misrepresent facts regarding assets or obligations, this phase of the divorce may be quite challenging. The other party must provide several records upon request. Usually, one party will send the other party interrogatories to do this. Interrogatories are questions that must be answered under oath by the other party.

Discovery is often used to obtain data on assets and debts, but it can also be used for other things. Information collection is one of these additional goals in the event that one party is allegedly at blame for the divorce. Numerous behaviors, including alcoholism, drug misuse, adultery, gambling, and abandonment, are examples of fault. This error can be demonstrated by discovery.

When necessary, attorneys frequently consult with and hire experts like appraisers, accountants, or psychologists. A lot of these experts don’t come cheap. This can substantially drive your legal expenses.

Your Negotiation Begins Here

Following the conclusion of discovery, the attorneys will talk about the client’s objectives and start settlement negotiations. The exchange of written settlement proposals between attorneys is common. In an effort to address as many issues as feasible, the attorneys may also schedule a conference among the parties and the attorneys. The court is not involved in this process, which is also known as an informal settlement meeting. In the event that a settlement is achieved, the parties may sign a document outlining its terms.

Meeting the Friend of the Court

When there are minor children involved in the divorce, the parties may be obliged to attend an Early Intervention Conference with a Friend of the Court Referee, which is followed by a course meant to help parents lessen the impact of divorce on their kids. Depending on the county in which the divorce is being heard, a specific program may be necessary.

And then, The Waiting and Waiting

There is a 60-day waiting time before your divorce can be finalized if you and your spouse don’t share custody of any children. Even if you and your husband were already separated when you filed for divorce, the waiting period starts when you do. Your divorce may take far longer than 60 days if you and your husband cannot come to an agreement on everything.

Even before the case is filed or at any point during the waiting period, the parties may voluntarily decide to go through with mediation. Except in cases where there has been a history of domestic violence, the court would ordinarily mandate mediation in every case. The court will appoint a mediator if the parties are unable to reach an agreement.

Mediation is not advised if there has been domestic abuse in your marriage.

Depending on the situation, mediation may occur with or without the attorneys present. The mediation process is not legally binding. Making every attempt to settle every issue is the mediator’s responsibility. This minimizes court involvement and is less expensive than going to court. 

Typically, the parties split the mediator’s expenses.

If there are points in your case that you and your spouse cannot agree on, arbitration is another alternative. Arbitration is a purely optional process. This means that in order to enter into arbitration, all parties must concur on the question or issues that will be decided by the arbitrator.

The arbitrator is paid a fee by the parties to hear and decide their dispute. 

Because the arbitrator’s conclusions are enforceable in the same way that a judge’s decisions are, arbitration is distinct from mediation. The arbitrator is a skilled decision-maker who is an impartial third party. Their selections are incorporated into the verdict in a legal proceeding.

Court Appearances

The court will schedule a trial if the parties are unable to reach a settlement. Divorce trials are similar to other trials in most ways. To present testimony and evidence in support of each side’s case, the parties and their attorneys must appear. Depending on the circumstances, it could take a few hours or even days. The Family Court Judge will issue an Opinion on the contested matters following the trial (sometimes verbally from the bench and, sometimes, in writing). The Judge will then instruct one of the attorneys to draft a divorce judgment that includes all of the terms and clauses outlined in the Judge’s Opinion.

It goes without saying that the Judge will not sign this judgment unless all parties and their attorneys have studied it and agreed that it accurately reflects the judge’s opinion. The divorce is finalized when the Family Court Judge signs the Judgment of Divorce. The judge and court’s availability is the issue with going to trial. 

A trial will frequently be set alongside several other cases and continually postponed. Before the trial is held, the case may have been open for a year or more. When the trial is held, it may take a long time because the judge may need to handle other cases or crises that were on his or her docket longer.

Remember the per hour cost of attorney fees will accumulate as the trial progresses. This will make it difficult for your attorney to estimate the cost of servicing you. The length of the trial is not something they can approximate due to a lot of reasons. The judge’s time is one of these reasons.

Final Divorce Judgment

The Judgment of Divorce is an official court document declaring the end of your marriage and the terms of your divorce. The final, legally enforceable document approving the divorce is the Judgment of Divorce. It decides on a variety of matters, including child support, property division, spouse support, and custody and parenting time. Before the judgment is entered with the court, the parties will have a chance to read it, review it with their attorney, and sign it. There are separate orders for child support and spousal support payments if there are any.

Legal Fees and Costs For Your Family Law Case

You have to look at your legal fees and costs in the context of your desired outcome because the legal process always has costs. Whether you call it expensive or low cost is really dependent on the outcome you desire. This outcome is something you should discuss with your attorney at the beginning of the engagement. It is a matter most considered and decided even before you have your first meeting with your attorney.

If you have already asked about legal fees, you will likely get a quote for two fees: The retainer and the per hour fee.

Attorney Retainers and Per Hour Service Fees

Your retainer fee based on experience, expertise, and reputation of the family law firm may range from a low of $275 to $375. If you get closer to highly urbanized cities and business centers these per hour fees can go up considerably. The range will be wider if you look at the whole US with a range starting from a low $200 to a high of more than $400 per hour.

Retainer fees can range from $2000 to $6000. The bigger picture shows a range of a low of less than $5000 to a high of $7000. This could vary from city to city and state to state.

Now, a lot of factors can drive costs like we mentioned here. Each phase of divorce process and cases such as child custody, parenting time have their own unique costs.

Court Filing Fees

As of the time this article was written, court filing costs could be anywhere from $85 and $150. Fees cover custody and parenting fee, support fee, friends of the court fee, arbitration, mediation, contempt for parenting time violations, sanctions, etc.

Ancillary guardianship and conservatorship filing fees are $150, as are other civil filing fees for cases filed in the family division, according to the circuit court fee schedule. A petition for a subpoena to testify outside of the state is free to file. Do check with your local Circuit Court for an updated schedule of court filing fees.

For those who can’t afford lawyers, they have a choice of approaching the Friend of the Court for free services but usually these are reserved for child custody cases.

Client Driven Costs

There are actions driven by clients that are not really driven by fairness or the best interests of anyone. It is driven more by pride, anger, jealousy, fueling animosity between ex spouses. We refer to this as acrimonious battles. The representation of the child is so bad the court has to get someone else like an expert to represent the child. The cost of this expert will be charged to the parents.

Some costs are related to the valuation of assets in property division. Cost can escalate fast and enormously in these situations.

When a law firm or an attorney is quoting you an hourly rate, the attorney isn’t talking about the total cost. The attorney is merely giving you the hourly rate they will be applying when they put in the hours to work on your case. Your attorney doesn’t really know how much will be seen in your billings because they don’t know yet how many hours they have to put in until they actually work on the legal requirements of the divorce case.

So the best approach is to talk to an attorney and have  a vision of your outcome. Talk about how you are going to approach it, and then talk about fees.

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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.

Michigan is a no-fault divorce state. You are not required to provide justification for your divorce. In a custody case, it is not so much as you against the other party, but more of your capacity to care about the best interest of your child. Consequently, you actually don’t need to take any action to defend yourself against a divorce complaint. However, if you’re discussing child custody, it’s probably something you should give some thought to.

Click here to watch the video on What Evidence Can Be Used In A Custody Battle In Michigan?

We can have a long list of things that as evidence can be used against  in a custody battle. In Michigan, you can look at the variables considered by the courts to decide what is in the best interest of the child. There are a dozen things that could be utilized to call our capacity to gain custody of the child into question.

The Best Interest Factors Are Powerful But Against You

In a custody case in Michigan, the court will give you a chance to show you have the best interest of the child in your mind. There are a dozen factors the court considers in evaluating your position. If the other party is keen enough to observe you are providing the opposite of these factors, they will definitely use the observation against you in a custody battle. Why would they not?

If the opposing party’s attorney has a very good understanding of how these best interest factors are used, they will find enough things to use against you. Now what are these best interest factors?

The judge will decide custody and parenting time matters based on the best interests of the child if the parents cannot come to an agreement. The following 12 factors must be taken into account by the court when using this legal test:

Factor (a): The love, affection, and other emotional ties existing between the parties involved and the child;

Factor (b): The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to give the child love, affection, and guidance and to continue the education and raising of the child in his or her religion or creed, if any;

Factor (c): The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with food, clothing, and medical care or other remedial care recognized under the laws of this state in place of medical care, and other material needs;

Factor (d): The length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory environment, and the desirability of maintaining continuity;

Factor (e): The permanence, as a family unit, of the existing or proposed custodial home or homes;

Factor (f): The moral fitness of the parties involved;

Factor (g): The mental and physical health of the parties involved;

Factor (h): The home, school, and community record of the child;

Factor (i): The reasonable preference of the child, if the judge considers the child to be old enough to express a preference;

Factor (j): The willingness and ability of each of the parties to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing parent-child relationship between the child and the other parent or the child and the parents. A judge may not consider negatively for the purposes of this factor any reasonable action taken by a parent to protect a child or that parent from sexual assault or domestic violence by the child’s other parent;

Factor (k): Domestic violence, regardless of whether the violence was directed against or witnessed by the child;

Factor (l): Any other factor considered by the judge to be relevant to a particular child custody dispute.

Each parent will be given the chance to provide information pertaining to the best interest factors mentioned above at the hearing on custody and parenting time.

The law does not mandate the court to give each consideration equal weight when determining what is in the child’s best interests. The judge determines how much importance to assign to each factor.

You Need To Have Established Custodial Environment Or Else

According to the law, custody arrangements for children should not be altered. In order to avoid confusion, the judge will always ask if the child has an established custodial environment or ECE with either one or both parents. If so, additional evidence would be needed before a judge could change the current circumstances.

When deciding whether there is an ECE, the judge takes the child’s life into account. For example, does the child depend on one (or both) of the parents for support, affection, and other requirements like food and shelter? Is the child old enough to have experienced the current circumstance for an extended period of time?

In order to effectively prepare for any Michigan child custody case, it is crucial to comprehend how the established custodial environment interacts with the burden of proof. The parent seeking to create or modify the sort of custody awarded to each parent has the burden of proving that an established custodial environment exists. If you are not able to provide ECE, you can bet the opposing party is taking note of that. It can be used against you in a custody battle.

Judges consider the child’s life circumstances when determining if an ECE exists. Do the child’s needs, such as love and affection, food, shelter, and other necessities, come from one (or both) of the parents? Is the youngster old enough to have lived in the existing situation for a long time?

If the judge rules that there is an ECE, the party seeking to change it must demonstrate with clear and persuasive evidence that the change is for the child’s best interests.

Now if you are a parent that seems to demonstrate any of these behaviors, the other party may already have evidence you can not create an ECE for your child.

• Insufficient time spent with your child
• Leaving your house;
• Failure to fulfill other parental responsibilities or nonpayment of child support;
• Cutting off communication with your child’s other parent;
• Distracting your child from his or her regular activities;
• Removing your child from daycare or school without informing the other parent; and or,
• Engaging in verbal or physical altercations or failing to control your emotions;

If the judge rules that there is no ECE, the winning party will be the one that can demonstrate, through a majority of the evidence, the proposed custody arrangement will be in the child’s best interests.

Other Things Dumb and Shameless That Can Be Used Against You

The goal of your family law attorney may not always be to assist you win at all costs, despite the fact many parents have opposing views. Instead, it is their responsibility to uphold the interests of your child and persuade the judge your case is in the child’s best interests. 

Divorce is never simple to go through. Finding a suitable child custody agreement only serves to exacerbate the process’s emotional tensions, which frequently seep into and aggravate legal concerns.

Although the child custody procedure is challenging, this shouldn’t be a justification for acting in a way jeopardizing or completely sabotaging your case. Here’s some really dumb and shameless things you might be doing and seriously compromising your custody battle. Try not to make it dumber or more shameful.

Disobedience to Court Orders and Requests

If you disobey a court order, you could face penalties from the court and, worse still, it might discourage the court from listening to your case fairly. Being court-friendly is always preferable, and following the rules of the court is one method to do this.

Whether it pleases you or not, it is the court that mandates your custody arrangements, your parenting time. If they feel you cannot serve the best interest of the child by refusing court requests and orders, you are already on the bad side of the authority issuing parenting and custody orders.

Nothing will ruin your case more rapidly than failing to follow court orders, second only to acting badly in court and in your personal life. The court will typically view this as an indication of disdain for their authority, even if it won’t always result in you losing custody on its own.

Being dishonest.

Never take lying or being unfaithful to your spouse or partner lightly. These are typically grounds for dismissal by the court, and your dishonesty could unnecessarily undermine or complicate your child custody case.

By withholding information from their attorney, clients can sometimes make things worse and make it more likely that the attorney will be caught off guard in court. Giving your attorney the whole picture will enable them to fully appreciate the subtleties of your case and determine the best line of action.

Abusing alcohol and/or drugs and failing to confront substance abuse.

It’s understood concerns with substance misuse can have more serious, difficult-to-address consequences, you shouldn’t take this for granted. You can be sure when the child custody battle starts, your partner will make sure the judge is aware of these matters and that they will have an impact on your child custody case.

Alcohol and/or drug misuse, especially when your child is present, provides your ex extra reasons to be angry with you because you are harming your child. You must take care to avoid doing anything endangering your child.

In Michigan, child custody is decided based on what is best for the child. Although treating the disease of substance abuse is challenging, if you regularly abuse alcohol or drugs, you should get help.

There is no disputing that a parent who abuses drugs or alcohol can have a negative impact on a child’s development; the court will view this as a lifestyle choice. We advise against sharing pictures of you using drugs or alcohol on social media for the same reason.

Digitally generating evidence against oneself.

It’s critical to avoid posting any images, videos, or other content on social media that can make the court view you as unsuited for the job of being a parent. Nothing will help your case if people see images or recordings of you drinking or using illegal drugs.

You can find yourself at a disadvantage in Michigan family court if you post irate rants on Facebook or Instagram or text the other parent irately.

You could suffer irreparable harm in your child custody case if venomous, hostile, or violent messages were included as evidence. Whatever your partner or ex-partner puts online, refrain from commenting on it and engaging in a virtual tit-for-tat.

Unwillingness to accommodate what serves the child’s best interests.

If you and the other parent are able to consent to collaborative discussions, you may in many situations even reach a beneficial parenting agreement without the help of the court. However, refusing to make accommodations can prevent you from getting this result, and your actions might end up being used against you in the custody dispute trial.

Michigan courts favor joint custody arrangements, barring any concerns about abuse. It is assumed a child will do best with contact, affection, and support from both parents. The other parent may end up with more parenting time if you are disrespectful or reluctant to work with them.

Criticizing or disparaging your spouse in front of anyone.

Even though you feel the other parent hasn’t done anything to deserve your respect, it’s crucial to constantly be polite to them. By acting honorably, you will not only help to safeguard your child but also provide the court with an opportunity to see why you are a superior choice to represent the child’s best interests. You simply shouldn’t be criticizing your spouse or speak ill of them in front of others.

Your loved ones and friends are also subject to this constraint. The main issue is that anything you say to anyone can be used against you in a custody dispute and can give the court the impression you are unreliable.

Even if someone you confide in doesn’t consciously repeat what you said, they might still be called to testify in court or at a deposition. When they make the swearing to reveal the truth, they lose control of the situation. They could therefore have to violate your trust.

Introducing your new partner to your minor child.

It would be more appropriate if you don’t start a romantic relationship with anyone during this time, so resist the urge. It can be quite upsetting for kids to witness their parents having an intimate relationship with someone else during the arduous process of divorce.

Do not let someone you’ve been seeing around your child while your child custody arrangement is still being decided in court. Taking this step can prevent your child from becoming confused, unnecessary drama from occurring, and conflict with your ex-spouse. Legal difficulties may result from any of these consequences. Take effort to keep things calm.

Absence of a Family Law Attorney

Despite the fact that you are not obligated to have legal representation, your child custody dispute is too crucial to be left to chance. Only a certified family law attorney is able to offer the assistance you desire—an experienced, knowledgeable, and committed expert working on your side.

You probably are doing a lot of dumb and shameless things above because you either are not listening to good advice or you don’t have someone giving it. It probably means you don’t have a good attorney. A good one will never put up with all the dumb and shameless things you do.

Working with an expert lawyer is a necessity if you are sincere about securing your child’s best interests and safeguarding your own interests during the child custody procedure.

Your efforts to work on the best interests of your child is the most evidentiary behavior visible to the court.

Work with your attorney.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel today for more advice on Family Law!

Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.