What timeframes are important for divorce? This is the typical Michigan divorce timeline. The court will consider a six-month schedule if there are children involved in the divorce. The court wants you to consider matters because they might have an impact on the children. Of course, the court has the authority to adjust this schedule.

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The court will have different concerns if you are divorcing without children. Your divorce lawsuit must be resolved within 60 days. Even if you’ve already sold off some of your assets, the court will nonetheless follow the deadlines.

There are additional timeframes, such as summonses, which have a mandatory 90-day duration. This indicates that a time frame is required for serving the summons. Without a legitimate summons, a case cannot be initiated. If the summons runs out of time, the court must reissue it. In order for certain divorce-related actions to proceed, these deadlines must be met.

The 60-Day Timeline

In Michigan, the required waiting period is 60 days if there are no children involved in the divorce. 

The divorce is likely invalid if the judgment is entered in less than sixty days. A court may waive the six-month waiting time under Michigan law, but not the sixty-day one. In instances of “exceptional hardship or such compelling necessity as shall appeal to the conscience of the court,” the six-month waiting period may be extended but never to fewer than sixty days.

After the filing of the complaint, the other party is given some time to respond.

The defendant has 21 days (or 28 days if served by mail or outside of the state) following the filing and service of the complaint and summons to file a response of admission or denial of each allegation in the complaint.

The time set to respond should already constitute almost half of your waiting period.

Once the answer is appropriately submitted, the case becomes contested. An order of default could be issued if the defendant fails to submit an answer. The case then turns into an uncontested divorce. A defaulted defendant may, however, choose to hire a lawyer and ask the court to overturn the default at any point until the case is resolved.

You can add the amount of time contributed by the issuance of temporary orders, discovery, negotiations, and a lot more key processes leading to the first court appearance. In essence, the 60-day waiting period is basically consumed by the first few stages of the divorce process.

The 6-Month Timeline

If there are small children involved in the divorce, there is often a six-month waiting period. There is a lot of pressure on Michigan’s courts to resolve divorce cases within a year of the filing date. Six months are the “normal” waiting period for a divorce including children once the complaint is filed, or when the lawsuit first begins. The majority of child custody disputes that go to trial last more than six months but are often resolved in less than a year.

The six-month waiting period has exclusions.

A court may waive the six-month waiting time under Michigan statute, but not the sixty-day one. The six month waiting period can be shortened but never less than sixty-days in cases of “unusual hardship or such compelling necessity as shall appeal to the conscience of the court. In reality most of the judges will waive the six-month waiting period if there is a reason to do so and they are made aware that it is a collaborative divorce case.

An alternative to the protracted legal fights characterizing typical divorce litigation is collaborative divorce. Both parties to a collaborative divorce agree to work with qualified professionals to end their marriage outside of court.

The collaborative law process is you and your spouse appearing in court and asking the judge to approve the agreement you formed together. This can help you avoid the inconvenience, cost, and unpredictability of a divorce trial while maintaining your privacy.

What’s With the Waiting

The waiting period for a divorce in Michigan is mandated by Michigan Compiled Laws 552.9f. A Michigan divorce without a minor child is permitted by MCL 552.9f, but it cannot be granted until 60 days have passed since the bill of complaint was filed.

A Michigan divorce with a minor child (under the age of 18) cannot be finalized “until the expiration of 6 months from the day the bill of complaint is filed,” according to the same statute, MCL 552.9f.

Simply put, the statutory waiting period in Michigan is 60 days for divorces without minor children and 6 months for divorces including minor children.

Now what’s with all this waiting for. 

It’s been a policy of the state to preserve the institution of marriage as much as possible and to protect the unity of the family subsequently serving the interest of children. The waiting period provides opportunities for several key moments to happen.

A moment for second chances.

A divorce filing can usually follow an explosive dispute and is done out of haste and rage. A waiting period gives combative partners some time to calm down and decide if this is really what they want.

Once a divorce complaint is filed in court, the looming reality of separation can trigger couples to begin talking about their issues in a new way. Or the spouse who requested the divorce might leave the household and discover that living alone is not what they had envisioned. 

The couple has time to consider the possibility of reconciliation while waiting.

Preparing for post-divorce parenting.

A new living situation necessitates a new approach to daycare, school systems, and visitation. Parents may decide they would rather make amends and give their marriage another try than to end it as they learn to co-parent in different homes.

If the parents are unable to come to an agreement, there will need to be a trial when both sides will present their evidence, and the court will decide who gets to keep the child. The judge may request that a custody investigator with specialized training evaluate each parent’s capacity to care for the children before trial. 

It may take months to decide whether a custody arrangement is in the “best interests of the child” as provided for in the Child Custody Act.

Navigating your financial maze.

Few people actually recover financially from divorce better than they would have if they had stayed married. The couple’s expenses virtually double compared to when they were cohabitating as one household becomes two households.

It might take some time to gather all the relevant paperwork, add everything up, and determine how to effectively divide one person’s debts and assets from the other’s because married couples generally combine their finances.

Just a few examples include checking accounts, investment accounts, insurance plans, bank loans, and credit cards. An appraisal is required for tangible assets like real estate, vehicles, and other goods. Either spouse—or both—must locate new housing.

For high asset divorce, the parties may have to hire specialists to do discovery and valuation of assets. For those with a considerable number of years of work, there will be retirement or pension to consider.

Federal law requires a separate document known as a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) or an Eligible Domestic Relations Order (EDRO) when there is a government pension if either party has retirement benefits in the form of a traditionally classified pension plan, 401K, or other type of retirement plan.

Typically, these records are added after the divorce judgment has been granted. It might be difficult to get the parties to agree on the precise language and have the language verified by the plan administrator because each pension plan administrator has their own terminology that they require in a QDRO or EDRO. Many Michigan divorce attorneys consult a QDRO expert to create these documents.

A moment for mapping settlement.

The initial divorce hearing for couples without children is typically scheduled by Michigan courts at least 60 days after the divorce complaint is filed. 

Before the first court hearing, couples with a limited number of disputes can frequently come to an agreement on the terms of their divorce. By then, the 60-day waiting period has elapsed, the divorce can be finalized at that initial hearing.

In the event a settlement cannot be reached by the first court date, the parties have at least had time to identify their differences in opinion, determine how much more time they will need to reach a resolution, and consider whether a mediator may be necessary.

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When the divorce is finalized, you return home to an empty house. What can I do if my ex-husband abandoned us and grabbed everything? Keep in mind that you own half of the items in the house and your spouse owns the other half. Making an inventory is the smartest move to make. You may easily record a video of what is within the house. You have two options: either you restore it or you sell it for what it is worth.

Click here to watch the video on What Can I Do If My Ex Left & Took Everything In Our Home?

Coming home to an empty house after a divorce can be distressing for the children. In order to have everything restored, you might need to submit a motion to the court. If you, the spouse, are considering packing up the entire home, you should first consult with an attorney. You must approach the court to order that no one should touch certain assets if you want to keep them.

Half Of The Marital Asset Is Split 50/50

Michigan divides marital property according to the “equitable distribution” principle. Asset distribution in states with community property is intended to be as equal or close to a 50/50 split as practicable. Equitable distribution refers to the division of property based on an evaluation of what is just in each situation.

In states with community property laws, the court must divide the marital estate equally when a couple files for divorce. Judges in states with equitable distribution have the discretion to stray from a 50/50 split. The courts typically allocate assets fairly and evenly, despite the fact that Michigan is an equitable distribution state.

Bottom line in subscribing to this “equitable distribution” principle means your ex can’t just take everything from your house and go. Half of the value of every item your ex took from the home belongs to you. It means everything including things not even found in the house like cash in your bank accounts and unfortunately even your debts.

The home where all of those things your ex took everything from is also subject to the 50/50 split. 

If you or your spouse uses assets from the marital estate, especially recklessly by accruing debt, spending it carelessly, or hiding, selling, or disposing of assets, it is referred to as “dissipating” the marital estate. The offending spouse may experience serious consequences as a result.

When a couple separates, they could elect to relocate their belongings out of the marital home and into a new place. There may be disagreements on what you and your spouse believe to be personal property. Your clothes and personal accessories are obviously not up for equal distribution and should not be a problem.

Not everything you want to take will ultimately be considered separate property in the process. For instance, you might decide that you want to pack up your house and transfer everything to your new apartment. Your spouse is obviously left without a place to rest or sleep as a result of this. If you have kids, it may be a traumatic experience for children to have to come home to an empty house.

Restoring The Status Quo

The decision to get divorce is not a spur of the moment thing. You may have already contemplated this years, months or at least weeks prior. If you were smart about it, you would have talked to an attorney already. 

A good attorney would have advised you to do an inventory of assets in the house.

Doing an inventory of assets in the home.

Notably, before the divorce is finalized, either party or both parties may contest the removal of property. You might return home to find the rooms empty, for instance. While that is undoubtedly heartbreaking, you should prepare an inventory of your home’s contents based on your current memory. Of course, photos also convey a lot. 

A smart phone should come handy. You can record everything in the house using a video on your smartphone. A good panning and zooming should do the trick.

Filing a motion to restore assets or freezing current assets.

You can ask your attorney to file a motion to have your items restored or returned to the house. If return or restoration is not possible to have it replaced or give cash in the amount enough to replace it. The more effective measure is to freeze assets without affecting your current ability to sustain current financial obligations.

The use of shared finances by both partners to cover reasonable expenses and costs, such as mortgage payments and child care fees, is permitted under the law.

However, a judge may intervene and order the freezing of all the funds in the account as well as any other marital property that is in jeopardy if there is proof that one spouse is trying to waste or conceal assets.

Even if there is no proof of wrongdoing, a couple’s assets could even be frozen from the start of the divorce process.

The law in Michigan is very clear that it is illegal to conceal assets during a divorce and that doing so will result in severe consequences. In a divorce, one spouse is not permitted to conceal assets to the detriment of the other.

Protecting What Is Separate

If divorce has been contemplated and the decision is moving on at a steady pace, it is wise to already talk to an attorney. You need to protect assets. Protecting assets should be a concern even if divorce is not even on the table.

Prenuptial Agreement

A written contract between two people who are getting married that specifies how future earnings will be treated, who will govern each other’s property, and how assets might be divided if the marriage ends in divorce is known as a prenuptial agreement. It is also known as an antenuptial agreement. In a way, even if the marriage doesn’t work out, the agreement gives each side certainty.

If one or both of the parties have significant assets, children from a previous marriage, potential inheritances, high incomes, a family business to protect, a desire to avoid the high cost of further litigation, or if one spouse had a previous marriage that was perceived to have ended unfairly, these agreements are fairly typical.

Antenuptial agreements will be enforceable in Michigan if steps are taken to limit an unfair outcome such as:

[1] signing the premarital contract far in advance of the wedding,

[2] ensuring that separate legal counsel is retained for each party,

[3] The agreement could incorporate a progressive property settlement schedule based on the length of the marriage if the parties’ wealth is significantly unequal.

Post Nuptial or Antenuptial Agreement

A prenuptial agreement and a postnuptial agreement are very similar, with the exception that a postnuptial agreement is made by a married couple. It is a legal document that spouses sign jointly that specifies how their assets and debts will be split in the case of a divorce.

Postnuptial agreements that were signed while the parties were still married and that appear to have been made with the intention of divorcing one other have historically been revoked by the courts. But there are some circumstances in which a postnuptial agreement will be enforceable:

[1] When the couple has already filed for divorce or separated and then decides to get back together under the postnuptial agreement’s specific conditions.

[2] When a couple intends to divorce and signs a settlement agreement with the understanding that it would eventually be incorporated into the divorce decision.

[3] When the parties are still married, and only discuss what will happen in the event one spouse passes away.

When a divorce seems to be the only option, postnuptial agreements can be a helpful tool to keep your family together during trying times. However, in order for them to be upheld by Michigan courts, they must be carefully drafted and agreed upon under precise conditions.

Keeping Good Records of Gifts and Inheritances

Keep the documentation of how and when you received the inheritance or gift. This can be done using probate court records, copies of checks, or bank transfer records as long as they include the date, name of the person transferring the property, and the recipient. It can be tempting to toss these records away as time goes on. Don’t. Put them somewhere secure and apart from you, like your own safe deposit box.

Keep the documentation of the growth on the property as well as the location where the funds or items were deposited. You will be required to prove that the money was received as a gift or through inheritance and that you maintained the property separate if there is a divorce. Keeping accurate records moving forward is crucial. Do not rely on the investment firm where you made the deposit to maintain this data. The average record-keeping period at banks and financial firms is seven years.

The given or inherited property should not be mixed together. In other words, save any gifts or inheritance you receive from family members in a separate account. Do not include it in an existing account. Don’t deposit any earnings from the marriage into this account. It’s possible to classify adding “marriage money” as commingling. Combining with other properties can make them lose their own characteristics.

Do not include your spouse’s name on any real estate if the property is in the form of real estate. Legally, you are giving your spouse half of the property in this manner. It will lose its “separate” classification as a result of this. In the event that it is deemed to be marital property, your husband will likely be entitled to half of its worth.

If you inherited real estate and money as a gift or inheritance, it is ideal to utilize the cash to cover the real estate’s property taxes, insurance, and other costs. Provide solid documentation, such as copies of checks from your separate account, to support the source of these funds.

Additionally, it would be ideal if you could pay your income taxes on your separate investments’ earnings from the gift or inherited property. According to current Michigan law, paying income taxes on earnings made using marital funds or declaring investment income on joint taxes does not transform separate property into marital property. If you can demonstrate that you paid taxes on the income, it will be simpler to demonstrate that the property remained separate.

Avoid consistently using this money to sustain the family and try to keep it safe. Your separate funds may stop being separate if you routinely utilize them to pay for home expenses.

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A dozen factors are taken into consideration by the court while making a custody decision. These factors assess the child’s level of stability. What exactly qualifies as a stable home? You as a parent need to be a source of trust for a child. Possessing what they require at the appropriate time is the most trustworthy thing. 

Click here to watch the video on What Is Considered An Unstable Home For A Child In Michigan?

A parent missing visitation is a sign of an unstable home. Guests who do not act as a parent figure, such as boyfriends or girlfriends. Kids aren’t given any direction. Children need to understand they are in a secure and healthy environment. Your chances of getting custody of your children may be jeopardized in the absence of stability.

A Child’s Established Custodial Environment

A custodial environment may be established if, over a “appreciable” period of time, the child has grown close to a parent or another adult in whom he or she receives discipline and teaching, looks for direction and support, and who also meets the child’s needs and provides “parental comfort.”

The stability of the bonds between parents and children will typically determine whether an established custodial environment exists. Age of the child, the physical setting in which a parent or custodian has provided care for a child, and the feelings shared by the parent and child regarding the nature of their relationship are all things you could take into account.

It is crucial to understand that just because a child lives with a parent, it does not automatically imply the parent has an established custodial environment in place.

Even while a parent may have custody, it does not necessarily follow the child will exclusively seek out the parent for parental comfort, advice, and discipline. Because they have given the child direction, discipline, basic necessities, and parental comfort, both parents may have built a custodial environment with the child.

This custodial environment brings comfort and stability to children. The court gauges and measures the depth and quality of the custodial environment as a way to help decide on custody and parenting time issues.

The Unfit Parent Creates An Unstable Home

A parent is seen to be an unsuitable parent by the law when they fail to provide their children with the proper guidance, care, or support through their actions. Additionally, a parent will be ruled unfit if they have a history of abuse, neglect, or substance misuse.

Child Protective Services or CPS in Michigan is typically involved in cases where a parent is found to be unfit, and there may be a safety plan or an open, ongoing investigation against the parent.

Parents who are divorcing may not agree on child custody matters or may not trust the other parent with the children.

Never criticize your spouse in front of your child. In addition to damaging the children’s vulnerable psyche and making the whole process stressful for the children, this unnecessarily involves them in conflict between you and your ex-spouse.

Even worse, it can result in emotional alienation, which happens when a child begins to prefer a parentless home as a result of one parent’s critical remarks. Courts have a zero tolerance policy for this conduct and will take severe action against any parent who engages in it.

Even though it can be challenging, it is crucial to control your emotions in tense circumstances like divorce or a child custody battle. Although you might be tempted to give in to your annoyance and explode in anger, you must resist the urge.

Courts are less inclined to assign custody of a child to a parent who exhibits volatile emotions, particularly strong ones like rage. Even if your spouse is angry and spiteful, it is best to refrain from responding in kind because doing so will only make things worse for you.

Never take lying or cheating on your partner or spouse lightly. Your dishonesty may unduly weaken or cause the court to complicate your child custody case as these are often grounds for dismissal.

Additionally, resist the impulse to start or sustain a romantic relationship with anyone else while your divorce is going on. Children may experience extreme discomfort when they witness their parents having an intimate relationship with another person. Divorce is a painful process for children.

This kind of behavior may not be seen positively by Michigan courts since they consider it harmful to the child.

In the extreme, a parent can make a home unstable when there is prevailing atmosphere of child abuse manifested either as a physical harm or mental harm. We described this form of bodily harm to a child in an article entitled, “What Is Considered Child Abuse In Michigan?” You can read the article in our Legal Blog here.

We described any harm to the child’s bodily state as follows:

“Serious physical harm” refers to any physical harm to a child that gravely compromises the child’s health or physical well-being, such as brain damage, a fractured skull or bone, a subdural hematoma, a dislocation, a sprain, an internal injury, poisoning, a burn or scald, or a deep cut.

“Serious mental harm” is defined as an injury to a child’s mental wellbeing or condition that is not necessarily permanent but nevertheless produces clearly discernible manifestations of a significant disorder of thought or mood that materially impairs behavior, judgment, the ability to recognize reality, or the capacity to cope with day-to-day demands of life.

A Failed Parenting Time Creates An Unstable Home Too

In many families, one parent concentrates on earning money and working, while the other parent is more active in raising the children. Even though at the moment it seems like the greatest plan, if you have a poor track record of spending time with your child, it could hurt your case.

Which parent is the primary caregiver for the children, who makes dinner, and who assists them with their homework are frequently the topics of discussion in Michigan courts. Even though you could be working hard to provide for your family’s basic needs like food, shelter, and clothing, the parent who provides their child with better care has a clear edge.

During parenting time exchanges, you can ruin the parenting time experience by dragging the children into parental dynamics. 

This happens when parents argue in the presence or proximity of children. Making negative rhetoric or statements about the other parent or the other parent’s family members. Making queries about the other parent’s life from children. Passing on messages using the kids as intermediaries. Trying to ruin the child’s relationship with the other parent. Picking up or dropping off children too late or too early without giving the other parent a heads up. Being inconsistent in following parenting time schedules just to irritate the other parent.

Here’s a colossal failure you can do as a parent: leaving the family.

You have consistent parenting time for months and suddenly you’re gone.

Leaving your family behind before the child custody dispute is resolved could irreparably harm your case. The court might not view this decision favorably unless it is in accordance with a court order or was made jointly with your spouse and attorney.

Failing To Abide and To Sustain Custodial and Parenting Time Arrangements

There is a reason why child custody and parenting time is structured and defined a certain way. All of these arrangements are meant to serve the best interest of the child. In all the drama and pressures of divorce, parents tend to forget this. The court is not interested in the affairs of the parents, the courts have an almost absolute bias for protecting the welfare of the children.

This is the reason why courts even put up with minor criminal or misdemeanor offenses in the personal history of the parents. They are willing to ignore misdemeanors just to ensure the relationship or the bond between parents are kept and sustained through the life of the children. This is the whole point of equitable custody and parenting time.

When a parent, through their selfish behavior disrupts the custodial arrangement or jeopardizes the parenting time, they create instability in the life of the children at home. Openly defying or circumventing the intentions of the court disrupts the arrangements meant to serve the child’s best interest.

Preventing a parent from seeing the children leads to instability in the home. It doesn’t go well for the child, and the court frowns upon such behavior. The court has no problem throwing the book at a parent who tries to disrupt the stability in children’s lives. 

Stability in the home for children will define the quality of your parenting. More than being appreciated as the parent of the year, stability in your home for your child is a determining factor if you will continue to be the custodial parent.

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In terms of your spouse’s parenting responsibilities, you are expected to be the foremost authority in the nation. In terms of parenting time, you are aware of your partner’s preferences and expectations. Creating a visitation schedule won’t be difficult if you communicate and work together. The other party is someone you are the closest to knowing. What does this indicate? To compromise with your spouse, you are in a better position. 

Click here to watch the video on How To Establish A Visitation Schedule Hassle-free In Michigan?

Co-parenting entails this: collaborating to get the optimal compromise so that everyone receives the ideal timetable for themselves. You must recognize that the court has a different priority. The judge is more interested in how much time you spend with the children. If your personal priorities conflict with the child’s best interests, the court may not take that into account. The court will find a solution for you both if you can’t come to an agreement with your ex.

The Powerful Statutory Basis For Parenting Time

The time a child spends with each parent when they do not share a residence is referred to as parenting time. In Michigan, unless a judge finds that parenting time will damage the child’s physical, mental, or emotional health, a child has a right to parenting time with each parent. 

It is generally in the best interests of a child to have parenting time that is consistent, long-lasting, and of a nature fostering a positive bond between a child and parent. This is embodied in a Michigan law MCL 722.27a(1).

The MCL 722.27a(1) clause states as follows:

“Parenting time shall be granted in accordance with the best interests of the child. It is presumed to be in the best interests of a child for the child to have a strong relationship with both of his or her parents. Except as otherwise provided in this section, parenting time shall be granted to a parent in a frequency, duration, and type reasonably calculated to promote a strong relationship between the child and the parent granted parenting time.”

The Friend of the Court is your ally in ensuring the proper implementation of parenting time. MCL 552.519 mandates the Friend of the Court Bureau of the Michigan Supreme Court, State Court Administrative Office, create publications to aid each friend of the court office in performing its duties.

The previous Michigan Parenting Time Guideline was released in 2000 with the goal of educating the general public and professionals, such as court personnel who assist parents in creating parenting time plans, on good parenting practices. The most recent edition of the Michigan Parenting Time Guideline was published just this March 2022.

Get The Parenting Time Guideline

Now a lot of work has been done on the “guideline” so don’t dismiss this very useful document just yet. It can save you a lot of trouble in the future if you just find time to have a few minutes of reading. You want to start on the right track, this is it.

Here’s a bit of history about the guideline.

The Friend of the Court Bureau worked with the Chance at Childhood Clinic at Michigan State University College of Law to study current best practices in other states and make adjustments to the Guideline recommendations. For information on their accomplishments and challenges, experts on parental time laws in other states were consulted. The Guideline was then examined by a Michigan domestic relations advisory committee.

With permission, sections of this guideline were adapted from the Arizona Supreme Court’s Planning for Parenting Time: Arizona’s Guide for Parents Living Apart parenting time guideline.

The Guideline has a dozen sections but noteworthy of these are the following sections:

[1] When to Use the Parenting Guideline

[2] Child Development and Parenting Time Considerations

[3] Special Considerations

[4] Safety Concerns

[5] Blank Calendar

[6] Sample Parenting Time Schedules

[7] Parenting Time Worksheets for Parents

[8] Parenting Time Assistance

These sections are a tremendous resource for parents who really want to get down to the details of parenting time and don’t have time to plan or to be creative with their parenting time schedules. There’s a lot of useful tips for the everyday hassles confronted by parents while they’re making the most of their parenting time.

You can download a copy of the March 2022 edition of the  Michigan Parenting Time Guideline in portable digital format here.

You Want It Hassle Free: Follow The Rules

A parenting time schedule can be established or modified by parents working collaboratively. Using the Guideline can assist parents in identifying situations where they concur and in resolving disagreements when they disagree.

To establish or modify their parenting time schedule, parents may also use alternative dispute resolution (ADR) procedures or submit an application to the court directly. ADR is a procedure used to attempt and resolve conflicts without having to go before a judge for a ruling.

Before the court or a Friend of the Court can put a parenting time order into effect, the judge must sign it.

A few weeks back, we posted our article “How Does A Co-Parenting Calendar Work For Parents Without Sole Custody In Michigan?” in our Legal Blog here.

In that article, we mentioned the first step to co-parenting is to manage parenting time. Parents who have no safety issues or concerns can use the recommendations in The Guideline for preparing their parenting schedule.

Here are some things to consider when doing your schedule:

[1] Contact with each parent at least once every couple of days, while also giving the parents “breaks”.

[2] Predictability and consistency.

[3] The child’s developmental needs are taken into account. With infants on a breastfeeding schedule, for instance, shorter, more frequent blocks of parental time may be most effective. The exchange of breast milk can be arranged by the parents.

[4] Nighttime parenting time with both parents when both parents previously took care of the child’s daily needs, either jointly or separately.

[5] Consider a “graduated schedule,” with minimal parenting time initially and increasing the frequency and duration of parenting time when parenting milestones are completed, when a parent has not regularly cared for the child or is not comfortable caring for the child.

[6] Parenting time should be scheduled as regularly as possible when parents live far away. For parenting time, parents might have to travel.

[7] The chance for both parents to attend events with the child, like birthdays, religious celebrations, and doctor’s appointments.

[8] An extended parenting time plan that could involve longer durations, including many consecutive overnights, as the child ages.

If you as parents are constantly talking to make parenting time work, it should be easy to come into an agreement in terms of your parenting schedule. You may not always agree but if you put the best interests of the child first, it should be easy to come to an understanding. In case of disagreement, the guideline provides suggestions as to how to resolve it.

ADR services are offered by Friend of the Court (FOC) offices to assist parents in resolving custody, parenting time, and child support disputes. Judges frequently request divorcing parents to meet with a mediator or another ADR practitioner to settle their differences. Parents can also use the Community Dispute Resolution Program or choose a private mediator to get ADR services.

The best approach to a hassle-free parenting time is to follow the parenting time order. If parents can’t agree, an investigation can be launched to find out more about what’s really happening in the parenting time.

A judge has the authority to direct the FOC to perform a custody and/or parenting time investigation also known as an evaluation and to compile a recommendation in the child’s best interests.

When the office receives a legitimate written complaint, the FOC is required to carry out court-ordered parenting time and custody arrangements in FOC matters. The enforcement of parental time may be used by these offices as a response.

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Couples should be aware that neither spouse is the sole owner of the marital assets. When you divide your assets as part of a divorce, you receive half of the value of each asset and your spouse receives the other half. Now, how to prevent having your assets divided during a divorce. All marital assets are jointly owned by you and your spouse in Michigan. You want to make sure you safeguard the portion that is intended to be yours. Therefore, while discussing any item throughout a marriage, only 50% of the asset’s value is actually being discussed.

Click here to watch the video on How To Avoid Losing Your Assets In A Divorce In Michigan?

If you owned a home prior to marriage and added your spouse’s name to the title of the home alongside your own during the marriage, you have just compromised your ownership of the home. In order to protect your right to half of the marital asset, you must ensure that the asset’s ownership or title remains with you. Now two people own your home. You recently donated your portion of the house to the union. Don’t compromise your ownership of the asset if you want to prevent losing it in a divorce.

Separate vs Marital Assets

Marital property is any asset that was obtained during the marriage, whether it be tangible or intangible. The house the couple purchased immediately after their wedding, the income the wife received while working as a hotel cashier during the marriage, and the husband’s pension plan are a few examples of what is commonly regarded as marital property under Michigan law.

Conversely, property bought prior to marriage, gifts received during the marriage, or an inheritance acquired while married are sometimes regarded as the separate property of the spouse who made the respective acquisition, gift, or inheritance.

In most cases, an inheritance received by one spouse during a marriage is regarded as separate property. If one spouse is awarded compensation for pain and suffering in a personal injury case while the couple is still married, the compensation is typically regarded as separate property.

Depending on how the parties handle it, property that is initially separate may not stay that way. Property may still be given to the other spouse in a divorce even if it is thought of as separate due to certain circumstances.

Separate vs Commingled Assets

It’s crucial to remember that, in the perspective of the law, separate property may occasionally intrude upon or turn into marital property throughout a marriage.  Example if the separate property was commingled with marital property or if the separate property was used for the benefit of the family.

If the spouse receiving the property “contributed to the acquisition, improvement, or accumulation of the property,” the receiving spouse may be entitled to a portion of the other’s separate property. 

This exception might take the form of a vacation cottage inherited by one spouse that the other spouse helped renovate, greatly increasing its value. It could also take the form of one spouse taking on household duties and child care so the other spouse can focus all of their energy on growing a business that was acquired before the marriage.

Here’s a few more cases of commingling:

The couple learns that their new marital home requires a lot of maintenance after purchasing it. The couple depends on the money from one spouse’s savings account, which she opened before the marriage, to make a lot of renovations. The modifications later result in the house’s value increasing.

One of the spouses has a savings account that she opened prior to the union. She wants to buy a house with her husband when they get married. She uses funds from her separate savings account to cover the down payment on the marital house.

In order to invest in a small business that she and her spouse intend to start together, one of the wife sells stocks that she acquired before to the union.

A separate property can also inadvertently be commingled hence becoming marital property. In Wolcott v. Wolcott, unpublished judgment, COA Number 351918, just before the couple’s marriage, the wife received a gift of 10% of a family-owned firm. She worked for the company as well. 

The couple kept separate bank accounts throughout the marriage, and the wife received payments from the corporation connected to her stock ownership that were put into a bank account that was entirely in her name. The trial court decided that the stock and the bank account belonged to the wife separately when the couple were divorced 16 years later.

However, on March 11, 2021, the Michigan Court of Appeals decided that the stock and bank account had been commingled and were marital assets due to two facts: 

[1] The wife’s employment income, which is typically a marital asset, was deposited into the same account as her stock distributions; and 

[2] The wife used distributions from the corporate stock, in addition to her other income, to pay marital expenses and household bills throughout the marriage.

Protecting Your Personal and Separate Assets

You may benefit from signing a prenuptial agreement before getting married if you are aware that you currently own or will inherit significant assets that you want to protect from divorce. 

Prenuptial agreements give parties the chance to specify what will happen to their assets in the case of their passing or divorce, allocating distinct possessions to each spouse. They also specify rules for managing the household’s affairs. Prenuptial agreements’ capacity to shield assets upon divorce is no longer as unquestionably true as it once was due to recent changes in the way Michigan courts read them.

You must treat your separate property differently from the rest of your family’s finances and possessions in order to maintain their distinction. This could require:

[a] Keeping an inherited fund in a separate bank account.

[a] Keeping your residence and vehicle in your name only.

[c] Refraining from making repairs or upgrades to inherited property with marital funds.

[d] Refusing your spouse’s assistance in running the family business or maintaining inherited property.

[e] Maintain accurate property records to establish your personal asset is a separate piece of property.

[f] Refrain from adding your spouse’s name to the certificate of title of your separate property.

[g] Ensure the payment of taxes of real estate properties and earnings from these properties are drawn from sources under your name or are coming from sources attributed to your personal account or from checking accounts with your name. If possible get the cash from earnings of gifted or inherited property to pay for the income taxes for earnings from these separate properties.

The Wolcott decision shows that an asset must be maintained totally distinct to support a party’s claim of separate ownership of an asset, even though it was unpublished and is therefore not a binding precedent. 

In that specific case, the Court of Appeals most likely would have determined that the stock and the bank account into which stock distributions were deposited were the wife’s separate assets if the wife had maintained a second, separate account into which she had deposited her paychecks and from which she had paid the marital expenses and household bills.

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You will encounter all types of people throughout your life. You’re going to get married. There will be relationships you establish. Some will be toxic. You might even decide to divorce a toxic individual and co-parent with them. With a toxic ex, how do I co-parent? Here, toxic refers to poison. The relationship you have with your children could become poisoned. You may be poisoning the children’s perception of the other parent.

Click here to watch the video on How Do I Co-Parent With A Toxic Ex In Michigan?

A decent person works with you to develop and maintain connections with your family, friends, and other important people in your life. The purpose of the interaction and dynamics is to foster a favorable atmosphere for everyone involved. Children can be perceptive too just like adults. Your children will eventually distinguish between toxic and non-toxic people. Both you and your children will endure the consequences.

The Wonders of Co-parenting

Co-parenting is when both parents actively participate in and work together on the raising of their children. The majority of divorce judgements and custody orders ask for some amount of co-parenting, with the exception of extreme circumstances, such as domestic violence.

Involvement in parenting time exchanges and child-related activities, as well as communication regarding doctor’s visits, parent-teacher conferences, and other child-related matters, are all examples of co-parenting. In terms of mechanics, this is having joint responsibility for making decisions for your children’s wellbeing, development, and connections with both parents.

The State Court Administrative Office of Michigan published the most updated edition of the Michigan Parenting Time Guideline last March 2022. It is a very useful resource for divorced parents in managing their co-parenting roles. What it does not publish in that guideline is the benefits of co-parenting.

After data from 4 decades of study on shared parenting, here’s what we found out.

[a] Parental ties are strengthened by co-parenting.

[b] After a year, 90% of parents agree that having joint custody had a significant good effect on both themselves and their kids.

[c] Children who have joint custody are 80% less likely to experience parental abandonment in the future.

[d] When both parents split parenting time, a child’s chances of being emotionally, physically, academically, and relationally successful are doubled.

[e] Shared parenting reduces the likelihood of parental conflict by 80% through eliminating unfairness and litigation.

[f] Co-parenting strengthens the love of both the mother and the father equally.

[g] Children between the ages of 0 and 4 showed notable advantages when each parent received at least 35% of the visitation time.

There’s very credible empirical data supporting the great things about co-parenting. This strongly supports the position of the state and the family courts about protecting the best interests of the child. It works and there’s data to support it.

We can celebrate and embrace all the above benefits of parenting but what happens if we end up with a toxic ex whose existence seems designed to ruin everything about co-parenting.

Yes, toxic ex. Your toxic ex.

The Toxic Ex That Ruins Co-Parenting

The toxic ex disregards the limitations of your recently ended marital relationship. They have a hard time moving on from ex-spouses and will cling to them for dear life, making it impossible for you to co-parent with them and start a new life. Remember that your new life still has your children in it. And so is your ex.

You’re co-parenting. Even if you do move on, your ex is going to be around on a more or less regular basis. Imagine meeting your toxic ex on a regular basis.

We posted an article way back about “How To Deal With A Vindictive Spouse During Divorce In Michigan“ in our Legal Blog here. In that article we wrote about all of those actions indicative of a vengeful spouse. And we enumerated all those manifested behavior such as:

[a] Refusing to adhere to court orders

[b] Lying or hiding assets

[c] Using the kids as a bargaining chip in the divorce

[d] Misrepresenting one’s ability to pay support expenses

[e] Avoiding joint parenting of children

[f] Causing the divorce to proceed with excessive lag

[g] Using coercive or intimidating methods during a divorce

[h] False domestic violence accusations

[i] Fabricated claims of child abuse

[j] Adopting irrational attitudes on simple issues

After the original divorce procedure, all of that same behavior mentioned above will now hound you when you’re dealing with a toxic ex. And, some of these behaviors you probably witnessed already, especially that you were once married to one.

Here’s some of the more common ones you should expect from a toxic ex spouse:

[1] They will use the court processes and systems to be around you longer.

Because they know you’ll bring them back to court, they will disobey court orders. This is a mix of passive-aggressive communication with an ex-spouse. Your toxic ex believes he or she has the right to penalize you and maintain contact with you through the legal system. This is one excellent reason to ensure that your settlement agreement is solid before filing for divorce.

[2] They will have no problem using your children against you.

By criticizing you and your actions in front of the children, they can attempt to turn your children against you. Alternatively, they may even abandon their own kids as a form of retaliation against you for whatever they believe you have done wrong. Similar to a vindictive spouse, a toxic ex feels wounded and can be dangerous. In an effort to dominate you or punish you in some way, they are willing to harm their own children.

[3] They sow the seed of doubt in your family and your social circle.

You’ll hear remarks that portray you as a failure because you can’t keep the marriage together. They will say and do anything it takes to defeat the objectives you set for yourself. Some of these toxic parents will even go so far as to prophesy their children’s aspirations would fail. Any comments from someone with such a manipulative and vindictive mindset should be disregarded.

[4] They see you and blame you for their unhappiness.

No matter what is making them sad, you will be held responsible. Your toxic ex will blame you if they mistreat your kids and make them resentful. You’ll take the fall if they get fired, the heater breaks, or just can’t seem to get anything right. You may go for weeks or even months without speaking to or seeing them, but you can be sure that if something goes wrong, you will be made responsible.

[5] You will be their excuse for their own bad behavior.

You can be sure if they decide to neglect your children’s needs, it will be due to something you said or did. They have to make it seem as though they had no choice in order to be able to live with their own poor decisions so as to lessen the guilt. They actually believe all of their poor decisions are the result of some wrong you have done.

[6] They will have no respect for your privacy.

Your life’s experiences will be examined with your children. Children are an easy way for the toxic ex-wife or ex-husband to learn details about you and your life. There is a distinction between cordial communication and an effort to exert control, which is what the toxic ex wants to do. They still believe they have a right to know what you are doing and who you are doing it with even though you are divorced.

[7] They will insert themselves into your new relationship and ruin it.

Your toxic ex will use all measures necessary to ruin any future relationships you may have. Because few people want to be in a relationship with someone who has a crazy ex interfering in the relationship, this makes it challenging to start new romantic relationships. This is one person who won’t be able to accept you are moving on.

[8] They exhibit similar behavior to people with narcissistic personality disorder.

Numerous aspects of life, including relationships, job, school, and money matters, are hampered by a narcissistic personality disorder. When they don’t receive the particular treatment or adoration they feel they deserve, people with narcissistic personality disorder may feel generally sad and disappointed. They might not appreciate the people around them, and they might not find their interactions to be rewarding.

You Can’t Co-parent With A Toxic Ex, Do This

There are recommended guidelines you can adopt from the Michigan Parenting Time Guideline. There are certain frameworks and templates you can use to create structure and enable you to communicate clearly parenting time plans and schedules.

Unlike a vindictive spouse whose behavior is driven by your behavior and the perceived pain you cause, a toxic ex is probably driven by a mental disorder or a deep seated unresolved emotional issue with absolutely nothing to do with you. So you probably won’t be able to change your toxic ex’s behavior with a talk.

Try to do this.

Come up with a plan.

Work on a good parenting schedule and make sure you embody this parenting schedule in a parenting time order. Make sure your parenting schedule has no gray area. A gray area invites opportunities for a toxic ex to start interference to your plan or parenting schedule. You need to have a parenting time order leaving no room for interpretation. Ask your attorney for assistance on how to make this possible.

Adapt a system for communicating allowing documentation of interaction.

There are already useful technologies online allowing communication, scheduling, and sharing of information without any direct interaction with your toxic ex. Learn these technologies and use them to your advantage. These technologies allow you to document your messages and activities. These can be useful in court when you need to ask for modifications in custody and parenting time. This will allow you to set boundaries.

Anticipate what your toxic ex will do.

You know once the parenting time order is issued, your toxic ex will find a way to circumvent or break it. Take note of how your ex is circumventing the parenting time order or the custody arrangements. Do not engage your ex. This is what your ex is trying to achieve, a continuous engagement with you in any form. When you are tempted to engage, think about your children and what they will witness. You have to institute a healthy boundary in your behavior. Talk to your attorney and provide your attorney your notes so there is basis for any motion you will be filing in the future.

Take care of yourself, your physical and mental health.

Any divorced parent will tell you that it’s difficult to deal with your ex on a regular basis, and having time alone without your children is a challenging transition. Take full advantage of the time you have to yourself now. The options are endless: rekindle old interests, read a good book, or spend money on your schooling. Whatever you decide to pursue, you should put all of your attention on what makes you happy. Seek therapy if you have too. Build and lean on your own personal support group.

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Every divorce has a purpose, and the division of marital property is frequently on the table. A lot of divorces never get to trial.  This indicates that most disputes, including who gets the house, are typically resolved by people’s attorneys. Now, in a divorce, can the judge order the sale of a home? 

Click here to watch the video on Can A Judge Order A House To Be Sold In A Michigan Divorce?

The house usually belongs to the marital estate. When it comes to divorce, the court is in the business of liquidating assets. You can refinance it and give the other party half of the house’s value, or you can take on a loan or assume a debt to pay off the other party’s obligation. In the end, the court wants to provide each party an equitable portion that roughly equals a 50/50 split.

During a divorce, marital assets are distributed. Marital property is the majority of the possessions you or your spouse acquired while you were married. It won’t matter much whose name is actually on the title or certificate of ownership. Unless it was a gift or inheritance, it remains marital property. You both own anything that is marital property.

The Marital Property

Marital property is defined as that which is gained or results directly from the efforts and investments of the parties during the marriage and is subject to equitable partition under Michigan law.

In a divorce, the assets of the marriage are divided. The majority of your possessions—or those of your spouse—were acquired throughout your marriage. It doesn’t matter whose name is on a title or deed if one exists. Unless it was a gift or inheritance, it is still considered marital property. Anything that is marital property belongs to both of you.

Be aware that this covers property acquired throughout the marriage, even if it takes place after a divorce judgment has been issued. For instance, even if you file for divorce (or are truly divorced) before the bonus or commission is handed out, if you earn it while you are married, it will be regarded as marital property.

It is irrelevant which spouse actually earns the asset. A savings or retirement account can only be linked to the wages of one spouse over the course of the marriage. That account is still regarded by the law as marital property.

The Property Division

Equitable division refers to the distribution of marital property in a way that produces a result that is fair or equitable for each spouse; it does not mean that the property is divided evenly.

According to case law, courts will take into account the following factors, even though there isn’t a set list of them in Michigan’s statutory law: 

[a] the length of the marriage; the needs of the parties; 

[b] the needs of the children;

[c] the parties’ earning capacity; 

[d] the source and contributions to the marital estate; and 

[e] the reason for the divorce, including marital misconduct.

There are a number of issues that need to be resolved when splitting interests in a house or other real estate. For instance, it will probably be essential for the opposing party to receive a counterbalancing equity buyout if one party seeks to receive 100% of the marital rights in a couple’s house. The parties will probably have to sell the marital house and divide the net proceeds if there is not enough flexibility in the marital estate to allow one party to maintain the home and grant the other party an equity buyout adequate to meet equal division of the marital estate.

In order to distribute the property in a fair and equitable manner, the court must be aware of its value. That’s quite simple with some assets, like a bank account. You will usually need to seek advice from an expert, such as a business or real estate appraiser.

Moreover, there are other matters to consider such as  the transfer of title to the property, the assignment of insurance and any escrow balance, the allocation of income tax and real estate tax benefits and liabilities, the use of security mechanisms, closing costs, the assumption of liens, encumbrances, ownership expenses, and occupancy expenses, the removal of a party’s name from third party liability (most importantly mortgage liability), the occupancy rights, sale provisions, closing costs, the apportioning of those obligations, and the assumption of those benefits.

Marital property includes the portion of a pension or retirement plan that was accrued during a marriage. In the event of divorce, the non-employee spouse is entitled to a portion of their spouse’s pension or retirement plan. Sometimes parties agree to maintain and not divide their respective pensions or retirement plans. Another alternative is to provide additional assets to the non-employee spouse equal to half of the retirement benefit accumulated by their spouse during the marriage.

Evaluating retirement accounts may be particularly challenging when they are divided prior to their pay-out period. In that case, you’ll need to determine the account’s current value, which almost definitely requires the assistance of an actuary.

The job of an actuary is to help clients reduce risk by estimating the financial effect of uncertainty using math and statistics. The risks associated with financial investments, insurance plans, and other potentially hazardous endeavors can be evaluated and managed by an actuary.

If you and your spouse feel comfortable negotiating, get together, make a list of all of your assets and liabilities, and decide how to share them. If you and your spouse have agreed, the judge will assess your settlement to ensure that it is fair and will usually approve it.

The Marital Home

The house where you and your spouse resided while you were married is known as your marital home. Think about who can afford to keep the house between you and your spouse. Typically, whoever owns the marital house is responsible for all of its expenses. Mortgage payments, property taxes, and maintenance fall under this category.

It makes sense for the person who can afford to keep the home when there is only one person who can afford these fees. Sometimes neither party can afford the house on their own, in which case the only choice is to sell the house and split the proceeds. You two might be able to come to an understanding over what should happen to the house. If you can’t come to a decision, a mediator or attorney may be able to assist you.

One of two things could occur if your case gets to trial and the judge chooses how to divide your property. The judge may order you to sell the home or grant it to one of you. You and your husband will split any proceeds from the sale if the judge authorizes one. Alternatively, if you owe more than the house is worth, the difference will be split between you.

Before a divorce is official, it’s customary for one spouse to leave the marital residence. Sometimes people believe that when they move out, their property rights are forfeited. 

That is untrue.

Before getting a divorce, a spouse who vacates the marital residence retains a property interest in it.

What is very true as we have discussed here is that a judge in a family court in Michigan can order a house to be sold to resolve property division in a divorce.

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Should I date while getting divorced? In Michigan, there aren’t many restrictions on your ability to date or socialize while going through the divorce process. Even though there are no limits or it is legal, you may need to think about how it will impact your children or your efforts to get a divorce quickly and amicably. There is no way you can introduce this new person to your kids. You most definitely don’t want to foster resentment toward your soon-to-be ex-spouse and add to the already tense divorce process.

Click here to watch the video on Should I Date During A Divorce In Michigan?

Keep in mind that by introducing your new date to the person you will be haggling with about your alimony, child support, custody, and parenting time, you are alienating your soon-to-be ex. You don’t want that person to hinder your ability to proceed later in the divorce procedure.

You Should Worry About The Optics

Both parents should be worried about the optics of new relationships. How is it going to look to the kids? Most of all, how is it going to look from the court’s perspective? 

Having a girlfriend or boyfriend could impede a quick or amicable divorce if you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are currently living apart and going through the divorce process. A relationship with a new person could taint property division as well as child custody, even if the person who was involved in the infidelity that led to the divorce is no longer in the picture.

Even if it’s unintentional, if you start seeing someone during your divorce, your spouse might assume you were secretly seeing them before you split up, and their lawyer might summon that person to testify in a deposition or even during your divorce trial.

Your spouse’s lawyer and even the judge may see your texts, emails, and social media posts related to your dating activities. These exchanges are public and could be used against you. The secret to getting through a divorce with the least amount of discomfort and embarrassment is discretion.

If you are getting preoccupied with a new relationship how will you manage parenting time which is challenging in itself already. If you weigh the amount of time you’re supposed to spend with your children and the time to arrange and set up your date with a new person, you will be making priorities against parenting time. You’re not going to look good compromising your parenting time in favor of a new relationship.

It may be assumed the person is too self-centered to act in the best interests of his or her children by dating openly at the early stages of divorce. The dating parent could appear as uncaring because the children’s best interests always take precedence in custody disputes.

The Consequences of Dating During A Divorce

The appearance of romantic partners (or anyone else, for that matter) around the minor children during parenting time may be restricted by family court judges. Even if it is not forbidden by a court order, the addition of a cohabiting partner or new spouse to the household may be cause for the other parent to submit an application to change custody or parenting time.

Dating during a divorce is often discouraged by divorce attorneys since it can raise the expense and angst of the divorce process. Although courts cannot expressly “penalize” a divorcing spouse for dating, it can still have an impact on the terms of the divorce settlement.

Never even consider dating someone else unless you and your husband have physically split and are living separately. Otherwise, a judge can decide to give your spouse a bigger portion of the marital assets and property.

Meeting a new love interest might worsen a child’s emotional distress and may have an impact on your claim to child custody.

Parents should be aware that if there is a good reason or a change in circumstances, custody and parenting time orders may be reviewed. The presence of a parent’s new romantic partner can cause these changes.

It’s disruptive and detrimental for children when parents push them to meet and build bonds with new partners who may subsequently leave their lives. In addition, a parent’s bad judgment may result in the loss of custody or parenting time if they bring in a live-in third party who the judge deems to be potentially dangerous.

Parents are permitted to pursue other romantic relationships with different partners after a separation or divorce as long as they still have parental rights over their children. These additional relationships might progress into a serious, long-term partnership that might result in cohabitation or marriage.

There is actually a statute prohibiting cohabitation with romantic partners without marriage in Michigan. Although this statute was never enforced by prosecutors, this act was never repealed, proving the Legislature still intended to keep this prohibition in place and that doing so was in the public interest. Violating the statute is a misdemeanor carrying a maximum sentence of one year imprisonment or a maximum fine of $1,000.

The emotional impact on your children, whether they are young children, teenagers, or adults, should be taken into account in addition to the legal considerations when dating while going through a divorce. Your children, your relationship with them, and how they see you will all be impacted by new relationships. Divorce is already a challenging process, so it’s crucial to consider how each decision you make will affect your children.

The Better Options For You

The most expedient choice is to not really start any relationship. However, we may succumb to the desire to seek emotional support, in the unlikely event of “love” finding its way regardless, it is better to exercise caution in embarking in this emotional adventure.

Use prudence when dating. If at all possible, wait until far after the divorce is official to even introduce your children to a new dating partner. 

If you fall in love with someone new, be upfront about your situation and refrain from dating them while you are still living with your husband.

Instead of looking for a new relationship, seek out a group of people who can relate to you. You can deal with any feelings of abandonment or solitude by joining the right support group.

Many spouses add a clause in their divorce agreements outlining acceptable behavior when it comes to new significant others as part of their divorce settlement. They may specify a minimum amount of time you must have been dating someone before they are allowed to see the kids or spend time with them. Exes may agree in more amicable divorces that they can only present a new spouse to their children after they have introduced themselves to one another first.

Your dating behavior can suddenly be the target of an investigation if your previously cordial relationship with your ex suddenly soured or if your already terrible interactions become even more nasty. Be wise when dating if you must do so while going through a divorce.

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Goldman & Associates Law Firm is here to with information about Child Custody and Divorce in the State of Michigan.

Is Michigan a mother or a father state? Decisions pertaining to divorce, such as child custody, would have favored the wife decades ago. Even if the courts would argue that it isn’t truly happening that way, fathers would assume the custody case will not go their way. 

Click here to watch the video on Is Michigan A Mother Or Father State?

Although there is some bias present, we have made great progress in eliminating it from judicial decisions. The best interest of the child is now a bigger factor in judicial decisions. The state no longer bases its decisions on who is wearing the skirt, however there may still be parental slander.

Perceptions Catching Up With Facts

Legal and physical custody are decided by family law courts based on the child’s best interests. The parent who has taken on greater responsibility for the child’s upbringing is likely to have an edge as they consider a variety of factors to determine what is in the child’s best interests. Even if circumstances are changing, traditionally, women have been more responsible for raising children.

It may not be fair to say of courts being gender-biased, considering more than half of the custody cases are not even decided by the courts.

Over 90% of child custody disputes were settled by the parents without the help of the family court, according to statistics on child custody. In other words, the judge only needed to approve the order based on the parents’ written agreement. The reality is most of the time, the court isn’t even deciding who gets custody.

In just over half of these child custody disputes in the U.S. the mother is mutually agreed upon by the parents to be the children’s custodial parent. 29 percent of these choices were reached without the assistance of a mediator or the court, 11 percent necessitated mediation, and 5 percent were reached following a careful custody analysis.

Only 4 percent of child custody cases were actually resolved in court.

According to some estimates, up to 40% of women may earn more than their partners, it is becoming more and more common for women to earn more money than their spouses.

The traditional view of alimony is that the guy should pay, and this is typically still the case today. Although precise figures are lacking, alimony is paid by considerably more men than it is by women. In reality, it is still quite uncommon for a woman to be the ex-spouse making alimony payments.

However, it is becoming more typical for males to receive alimony. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there were 7,000 American men getting alimony in 1998 and 13,000 in 2008.

Data is telling us gender is not really an issue in the state of Michigan or in the other states.

The Courts Are Gender Neutral

The courts in Michigan or in any other state, is neither a mother or father state in as far as data on alimony or child custody is concerned. The data is telling us that the courts are not even deciding on these cases since it is resolved by parents among themselves.

If you are seeking divorce today, your goal should be to avoid a trial. About 98% of divorce cases are actually settled out of court. It’s best to settle your dispute outside of court than to go down the path of litigation and fighting. If there is a dispute over custody and you are the father, you have rights, and whatever is decided regarding custody and parenting time should be agreed upon by both you and the mother. Parenting time and custody arrangements should be made by the parents, not the court system.

Even though 90% of the child custody cases were resolved out of court, 79.9% of those out of court agreements have chosen mothers to be custodial parents according to 2018 data. The data is actually lower than its 2014 statistics of 82.5% of mothers being chosen as custodial parents. If this trend continues, there’s a likelihood fathers might become a preferred custodial parent in the future. This is not the court’s choice but the mutual agreement of parents.

In Michigan, 51% of custody arrangements end up with mothers while 40% are joint custodies. 7% of the time, fathers can get custody. Note that most of these arrangements were decided among the parties themselves out of court.

We can no longer even speculate if courts are gender neutral considering only 4% of child custody cases are actually decided upon by the court. The courts are more focused on the child’s best interest than settling disputes between husbands and wives.

The Future’s Looking Good For Both Gender

So, we can already conclude that the court system has been mainly gender neutral so far within the limited number of cases it handles directly. It handles 2% of divorces cases and 4% of child custody cases.

So when we say women get awarded child custody 90% of the time, it simply means that during an out of court settlement both spouses agreed to have the mother become the custodial parent. It’s clear the court has not been involved in this decision. This will mean higher child support for fathers.

This is not really bleak on the part of fathers considering that in the U.S. 74.3% of custodial fathers have full-time jobs. 

In terms of women becoming breadwinners, data shows we are getting there. 40% of households with married parents have women as breadwinners.

In the matter of alimony, we may not be there yet. Only 3% of spousal support arrangements in the U.S. are paid to ex-husbands. This is not really about gender-bias or the court favoring women, it is because women do not yet constitute the bulk of the primary caregivers and breadwinners of the country.

Although statistically only a small fraction of divorce and child custody cases eventually end up being decided by the court, it is important to remember the system has minimized gender bias in its determination and decision-making.

When you give both parents equal share in the outcomes of any divorce or child custody determinations, it forces shared parenting time to benefit not just parents but mostly the children.

In focusing on children rather than on the parents, it helps achieve the outcomes the statutes were designed to deliver. We’re not sure if the benefits can be attributed partially or entirely to the court system or the statutes but here is some good data.

[a] Co-parenting strengthens the bond between parents.

[b] 90% of parents concur that having shared custody had a major positive impact on both themselves and their children after a year.

[c] In a shared custody situation, infants and toddlers are 80% less likely to feel abandoned by a parent in the future.

[d] A child’s chances of being emotionally, physically, academically, and relationally successful are doubled when both parents share parenting time.

[e] By preventing injustice and litigation, shared parenting cuts the likelihood of parental conflict by 80%.

[f] Co-parenting increases both the mother’s and the father’s affection in equal measure.

[g] When each parent got at least 35% of the visitation time, children between the ages of 0 and 4 exhibited significant benefits.

The courts more particularly, the family courts in Michigan based most of their decisions on a set of factors applied to divorce and child custody as prescribed by statutes. 

Safe to say Michigan is neither a mother or a father state.

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In Michigan, the post-judgment equitable distribution of the marital assets is 50/50. Will the number of years of marriage affect the equitable division? So how long must you be wed before you receive half of everything? The length of the marriage is not the underlying issue. What should be regarded as marital assets is in dispute because they are the assets up for property division.

Click here to watch the video on How Long Do You Have To Be Married To Get Half Of Everything In Michigan?

Everything you bring into a marriage after getting married, including winning the lottery, becomes a marital asset. Whether you’ve been married for 18 months or 18 years, as soon as assets begin to amass, they are considered marital assets. The length of your marriage will not affect how much of the marital estate you receive after divorce.

Is It Before or After The Wedding

Before understanding what half of everything means, we have to understand where the halves are coming from. We also need to qualify what “everything” means. We need to talk about separate property and marital property.

Any property possessed by either party before the marriage as well as certain property received as a gift or inheritance during the marriage are considered separate property. Normally, the party to whom the separate item originally belonged retains it. Marital property can convert from separate property. 

In general, what you consider separate property is not going to be subject to equitable distribution. For instance, if you receive a financial inheritance from your parents while you are still married, that money is still your separate property. A gift and any property you brought into the marriage are treated the same way. However, this rule is not always true.

Any assets or debts obtained during the marriage are considered marital property from the date of the wedding until the judgment of divorce is entered. You and your soon-to-be ex are going to be free to divide the marital property.

In the course of a marriage, houses are usually bought. The home would be considered marital property and be divided accordingly. Couples who are divorced sometimes decide to sell their house and divide the money. Or, to maintain an equitable property division, one spouse may keep the house while the other obtains other assets, such as money in joint bank accounts.

What Matters Before Or After The Wedding

As we mentioned above, separate and marital property definitions seem straightforward. It seems very clear cut what assets are separate and what can be marital assets. There are actually certain exemptions from these definitions.

When assets are divided, separate property that has been mingled or blended with marital assets may be treated as marital property.

A court is likely to determine that everything in a joint bank account that has money coming in and going out during the marriage, whether it be through an inheritance or a gift, is marital property.

Another exemption would apply if the other spouse ever made a contribution to the separate property. The spouse who made the contribution may thereafter be entitled to a portion of the asset. Imagine a situation where one spouse owned a home prior to marriage but never shared an interest with the other. However, during their marriage, the couple split the cost of home improvements. After that, the non-owner spouse can be qualified for a share of the gain in the home’s worth that can be attributed to the modifications.

The above are examples of commingling of property. What you now thought were separate properties are now considered commingled property.

The word “commingled property” refers to the blending of separate property with marital property. Why does this matter? In short, it can be challenging—and perhaps impossible—for a court to decide how much of the marital estate consists of separate property. As a result, the spouse who combined their separate property may discover that as a result of the combination, the property becomes liable to distribution during divorce.

This will complicate the already complicated 50-50 equitable distribution split.                                                                                                         

Fifty-Fifty Isn’t Always Equal, So Is Being Fair

Michigan is not a community property state. Michigan uses the principle of “equitable distribution” in dividing marital property. Community property states aim to allocate assets as equally as possible or as near 50-50 split as possible. Equitable distribution states divide property in accordance with an assessment of what is fair in each case.

When a couple files for divorce in community property states, the law mandates that the court split the marital estate equally. Judges in jurisdictions with equitable distribution may deviate from a 50/50 division. Despite the fact that Michigan is an equitable distribution state, courts usually distribute assets fairly equally. 

Only in exceptional circumstances may a court impose a more disproportionate division, such as more than 60/40. In Michigan, spouses are free to come to their own agreement and submit it to the court if they prefer not to have it decided by a judge.

In most cases, judges will respect a couple’s property division agreements unless they are grossly unfair to one spouse or the other.

In Michigan, equitable distribution is the standard for dividing property. In other words, the property will be shared “equitably” or fairly, as opposed to equally. There is a presumption that the division will be nearly equal, and if the court decides to depart from the “roughly equal” standard, it must give an explanation for its decision.

When distributing property, the courts take a number of things into account. Here some of the most typical factors we came across:

[1] The origin of the asset;

[2] The duration of the marriage;

[3] The needs of the children and the parties;

[4] The parties’ financial resources;

[5] Support with acquiring it;

[6] The reasons for the divorce

[7] Common principles of equity; and

[8] Any additional factors the court finds important.

The situations where courts most regularly deviate from the “roughly equal” model of property split are short-lived marriages without children, situations where there is a substantial amount of separate property, or situations where one partner is in greater need.

Courts are less likely to attempt to return the parties to their premarital status in longer-term marriages or those in which the parties have changed their positions in reliance on the marriage, such as by having children or foregoing career or educational advancement, and more likely to compensate one party for their sacrifice for the family.

Now, what really will matter is what ultimately becomes marital property as the marriage accumulates assets. It’s not the age of the couples, it is not how long they have stayed married. What will matter is whether by definition any asset that came in during marriage is a marital asset.

If it is a marital asset, you are entitled to half of it when the court equitably divides it. There’s no waiting period for your half. The half you rightly deserve and entitled to.

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